Advice on mental health & anxiety.

How should you approach planning a big milestone event without excessive pressure?

Tommy suggests celebrating what's been built without 'burning down the house,' favoring ease and seamlessness over grinding or crazy pressure to make something work.

How can you tell if someone wants to talk about something they're not saying out loud?

Josh suggests that even without words, people unconsciously signal their emotional state through behavior (like being easily frustrated), and partners can learn to recognize these signals as a prompt to check in.

How can meditation help manage difficult emotions?

Use Sam Harris's approach via the Waking Up app of trying to dial back the intensity of a reactive emotion by roughly 30%, recognizing it as 'reaction thought' rather than an unchangeable response.

How can you reduce self-consciousness or negative spiraling thoughts?

Practice meditation regularly to build the habit of noticing when you're consumed by a thought spiral, then intentionally redirect attention to your breath and present bodily sensations rather than trying to stop thinking altogether.

How should you handle feeling burnt out while also supporting a team?

Tommy advises addressing your own burnout first ('put your mask on before you help other people') rather than only focusing on fixing others, since over-prioritising others can be a way of avoiding your own issues.

How do I enjoy doing mundane chores like the dishes instead of resenting them?

Bring full attention and presence to the task itself rather than mentally dwelling on other things you'd rather be doing; the resentment comes from being mentally elsewhere, not from the task itself.

What would you do if you found out you only had six months to live?

Tommy says he would go deep into meditation and practice rather than rushing through a bucket list, since the teachings suggest peace is found in presence, not in chasing experiences.

How much effort should you put into a new venture early on?

There's roughly a 2-year period where you should go all-in on a new venture to establish its footing in your own mind before others define it for you, even if that means working extremely hard.

How can you reduce the mental load of constant problem-solving?

Give yourself a daily moment to imagine 'what if I have nothing to solve,' even though in reality you may still have real problems; the point is to notice how much background problem-solving (e.g., deciding what's for dinner) you're doing without realizing it.

How do you deal with social anxiety about keeping a party or event going?

Adopt a 'hashtag not my problem' mindset and consciously choose not to lead or manage the room, even though it can feel uncomfortable or 'weird' at first.

How can you stop overthinking small social interactions like ordering coffee?

Josh plans to work on simply being direct and not worrying about what the barista thinks or whether he'll bump into someone, framing it as a 2021 resolution influenced by 'the subtle art of not giving a f*ck'.

What's a good, impressive-feeling last-minute gift idea?

A custom tote bag designed on Vistaprint with inside-joke quotes or sentences can look high-effort and personal without requiring much lead time, though it should be ordered a few days in advance.

How can you avoid unwanted small talk with a barber or hairdresser?

Tommy jokingly suggests seeking out a 'no banter' service, adopting a fake persona/job story to deflect personal questions, or simply not engaging so the other person stops talking.

How can you get through a conversation when you don't feel like talking?

Tommy recommends being upfront and asking the other person if they can do the talking while you just listen, which he's done successfully with close friends and his partner.

How do you deal with intrusive or negative thoughts?

Picture your mind as a service station where thoughts are cars pulling in — you can choose to watch a thought arrive and leave without climbing in and being carried away by it.

How can you make mundane physical tasks feel like meditation?

Treat transitions between tasks (like getting up to grab a drink) or repetitive physical work as trigger points to focus on the action or movement itself, bringing mindfulness into everyday moments rather than confining meditation to formal practice.

Should I tell a client or colleague I'm not feeling great?

It can be valuable to acknowledge you're not feeling great at the start of an interaction rather than defaulting to 'good,' as it can create authenticity and connection, though it should be done as 'radical ownership' without expecting anything from the other person.

How can I pull myself out of a negative mental spiral during lockdown?

Try a combination of light activities: play a competitive game like Uno with your partner, treat yourself to something small like an ice cream, and finish with a Metta (loving-kindness) meditation where you direct feelings of love toward yourself via a loved one.

How do you build a better meditation practice?

Use transition points in the day (like getting up from your desk) as triggers to become mindful of your state, rather than treating meditation as isolated to the formal sitting session, to avoid 'snowballing away from mindfulness.'

How do you deal with burnout from overworking?

Tisdell recommends prioritising, putting value on your time (raising your rate for difficult asks), and giving yourself explicit permission to say no to things, even if it means other commitments must change.

How do you learn to love or forgive yourself?

Tisdell suggests it's less about 'loving yourself' and more about forgiving your own mistakes and faux pas, recognising you're human and that perfection isn't real, rather than holding onto every error indefinitely.

How can I tell if I'm too stressed without realizing it?

Tommy suggests that physical symptoms like jaw soreness or teeth grinding, and behavioural signs like repeatedly doubting whether you've done routine tasks (like closing a garage door), can be signals of underlying stress even when you don't consciously feel anxious.

How do you deal with other people's frustrating actions (e.g. rule-breaking) during a crisis?

You can't change someone else's actions, but you can work on your own reaction to them — observe the emotion (like anger) in your body in the moment rather than reacting immediately.

How do you manage intrusive anxious thoughts?

Using a CBT technique: acknowledge the anxious thought, verify the facts (e.g., check all doors/cupboards), tell yourself 'that's just a thought, not my reality,' thank the thought for trying to protect you, and then let it go — though this requires ongoing practice.

How can you protect yourself from losing everything if one social platform fails?

Spread your content and audience across multiple platforms (YouTube, podcast, website) rather than relying on a single platform like Facebook or Instagram, so that if one account is disabled or hacked, you don't lose everything.

How can you cope with social anxiety about running into familiar faces (like regular baristas) after a long absence?

Tommy suggests the key is 'not giving a fuck' about how others perceive you, framing getting better as learning to care less about imagined judgment rather than eliminating the anxiety itself.

Which COVID-safe greeting is better — a fist bump or an elbow bump?

Tommy argues the elbow is better than the fist bump because a fist bump brings a hand closer to your face, which is riskier for touching your face afterward.

How do you deal with a fear of flying?

If you can drive confidently without nerves, you shouldn't have nerves in the sky either, since driving statistically carries more risk; treat air travel routines on 'autopilot' rather than dwelling on the fear.

How do I start meditating without getting discouraged?

Go slowly, don't set rigid expectations, and understand it's a journey like training for a marathon — give yourself the best shot and see how it goes rather than expecting immediate success.

What posture should I use when meditating?

Sit with a straight spine (critical for the 'meditative flow' of energy), keep arms uncrossed and palms upward to stay relaxed, and if sitting unsupported is uncomfortable, use a pillow against a wall, couch, or bed backboard, or sit in a chair with feet flat on the ground.

How should I set up a space to meditate at home during lockdown?

Designate a specific area in the house (not a workspace like the kitchen) as a retreat space for meditation, make it warm and comfortable with items like a candle, blanket, or cushions, and if possible agree with housemates to treat it as a no-work zone.

How can I fit meditation into a busy schedule?

Recognise that the average person spends around 2 hours a day on social media, and choose to redirect just 5 to 10 minutes of that time to meditation, since prioritising your health is your own responsibility.

How should you handle worrying that someone dislikes you?

Recognise that your own narrative about someone hating you is often exaggerated; if you've helped them or been kind, they'll come around, and ultimately not everyone has to like you — that's okay.

How do you stay present and avoid getting overwhelmed by a busy schedule?

Use journaling at the start of the day to check in on how you're feeling, and set personal yearly 'theme words' (like fun, creativity, presence) to return to whenever you feel off-balance.

When is the best time of day to wear sunglasses?

Seb/Mason suggests wearing sunglasses during peak sunlight hours, roughly 10am to 4pm, rather than first thing in the morning.

How do you deal with online criticism or backlash without it affecting you too much?

Tommy says he survives by not investing emotionally in criticism at all, mentally letting it go rather than dwelling on it, even though Josh feels things more deeply.

How do I pull myself out of a negative emotional spiral or funk?

First notice and name the feeling (using core emotions mad/sad/glad/ashamed/afraid), use physical movement or stretching to shift mood, build in small gratitude rituals, and avoid 'double time' self-criticism for feeling bad in the first place.

Am I responsible for how other people feel?

You cannot control other people's emotional states, only your own behavior and how you show up; set personal boundaries to protect yourself from others' negativity rather than trying to manage their moods.

Should I panic-buy extra groceries because of coronavirus?

Crystal Andrews advises doing a normal shop plus a few extra non-perishable items, noting there's no actual supply shortage, just high demand, and stores are restocking overnight.

Can using too much hand sanitiser cause skin problems?

Tommy relays that someone who worked at a health facility developed dermatitis-like red, raw, gapped skin from excessive hand sanitiser use during the pandemic.

How should you process alarming or divisive information without getting swept up in hysteria?

Observe and stay curious about why a story is being told before reacting; pause to form your own view through empathy rather than being carried away by other people's narratives.

How can you manage daily anxiety around unstructured time?

Lehmo says he needs a handwritten list every day, even a very simple one (like 'breakfast, lay on beach, go to bed'), because without a list he feels anxious not knowing what's coming next; he also uses lists for every stand-up set.

How can you manage an anxious or 'churning' mind day to day?

Notice the thought, name it as just a thought rather than a truth, and let it pass through rather than suppressing or spiralling on it; pair this with daily breathwork and meditation.

How can you better understand and manage personal anxiety?

Acknowledge and identify when you're feeling anxious rather than ignoring it, since unrecognized anxiety can lead to reactive behavior that negatively affects relationships; practicing mindfulness helps.

How do you recover from a panic disorder that affects eating or swallowing?

Combine professional counselling (Jordan did around 20 sessions) with long-acting medication like fluoxetine if an underlying anxiety condition is identified; expect habitual physical responses to persist even after the panic itself subsides, and give the medication weeks to take effect.

How do you know when to leave a relationship versus work through problems?

A relationship only works if both people are 100% committed; if that's not the case, it will involve compromise that erodes it, and recognizing genuine incompatibility (not just conflict) is key to deciding to leave.

How can someone manage drinking again after a long period of sobriety without it becoming a problem?

Tommy suggests staying mindful about drinking rather than making it a core identity, recognizing that the day after drinking can bring more irritability and less patience, and using that awareness to self-regulate rather than ignoring it.

How should you handle a partner connecting your mood to drinking after you've had a few?

Tommy explains he pushed back when Amy linked his irritation with Bodhi to his having had drinks the night before, asserting that frustration with his son wasn't necessarily caused by alcohol, while still acknowledging drinking can affect his tone and patience.

What's an effective way to focus during mindfulness meditation?

Tommy describes using the breath as an anchor point to draw attention and quiet other thoughts, and notes that even recognizing when you're trying to 'game' or fight the meditation process is itself an act of mindfulness.

How do I avoid burnout as a consultant or solo business owner?

Treat rest and recovery as seriously as an athlete would, put rules in place around technology and sleep, and recognise that over-delivering to clients out of fear of under-delivering can hamstring your earning capacity and lead to burnout.

How do you keep morale high on a stressful multi-day shoot?

Max recommends being highly observant of crew/cast dynamics, giving confidence-building feedback using a 'praise-criticism-praise' sandwich approach, and quickly mediating interpersonal issues before they escalate, especially on longer 15-20 day shoots.

How do you stay calm when something goes wrong on a shoot?

Max says maturity and filmmaking experience taught him to problem-solve rationally in a crisis rather than panic, recognising that setbacks aren't catastrophic, unlike earlier in his career when he might have quit over similar problems.

How do you deal with anxiety or a panic attack in the moment?

Jeremy recommends breathing techniques (a 10-second in, hold, 10-second out, hold pattern similar to what special forces use), sitting still, and letting the uncomfortable feeling move through you rather than numbing it with distraction, medication, drinking, or partying.

How do you stay motivated to create without becoming outcome-obsessed?

Focus on loving the purpose and process of the work itself (connection, contribution, fun) rather than the end result, since the outcome is brief compared to the time spent in the process, and loving the process makes you resilient to criticism.

How do you manage the overwhelming opportunities that come with online success?

You can't say yes to everything — only commit to the really big opportunities, because saying yes to all of them will take over your whole life.

What should I do if a retailer refuses to honor a warranty claim?

Know that Australian consumer law often extends protection beyond the stated warranty period (e.g., Apple replaced AirPods after a year), and escalate to an ombudsman if a business keeps passing the buck.

How do you tell the difference between gut instinct and anxiety?

Treat your gut like a trusted friend separate from your thoughts; anxiety isn't purely negative and can carry useful information too, but the first step is recognising that your thoughts and your sense of self/purpose are two separate things, not the same entity.

How do you create more mental space without fully quitting your phone or habits?

Instead of eliminating things you rely on, add practices that create space—meditation, yoga, walking, exercise—so you can regularly separate from noise and reconnect with your own voice.

Should you tell your co-host or crew if you're feeling unwell before a show?

Keep how you're feeling to yourself in front of the wider crew since everyone is working hard and you don't want to let the team down; it's fine to confide in a close co-host, but the show must go on regardless, and you process how bad you feel afterwards in private.

How do you conduct a good interview with a guest or celebrity?

Try to connect with the person as a human as quickly as possible rather than treating them as a pedestal figure; research their last month of media so you're not repeating questions, and stay concise—too much banter before the actual question loses the moment.

What's the point of meditating if it doesn't bring permanent peace?

Treat meditation as a never-ending practice rather than a route to lasting enlightenment — it's valuable because it creates space to observe your own thinking and reduces how long you stay stuck in negative states, even though peaceful feelings vary day to day.

How should a growing business celebrate its wins without losing momentum?

Celebrate small wins deliberately (e.g., go out for dinner after an award) rather than letting them pass unnoticed, but avoid resting on laurels or treating celebration as a reason to slow down — keep heads down and focus on the next piece of work.

How can you get out of a negative emotional spiral?

Meditation can cut the duration of negative spirals significantly, and going for a walk can help reset your headspace even if others assume something is wrong when you say you're taking one.

How do you judge whether a mistake you made is actually a big deal?

Ask people around you that you trust and get an outside perspective rather than just ruminating on it alone in your head.

How should you support someone who is upset?

Don't rush someone out of a bad feeling by insisting they're fine or 'be happy' — doing so is more about your own discomfort than actually helping them, and it's okay to let someone feel shit sometimes.

How should you approach prayer or meditation effectively?

Pray in the language of your heart rather than reciting rote prayers, direct positive energy/intention into a situation instead of worrying, and practise relaxation (feeling and being, not thinking and doing) before attempting meditation.

What's the difference between bleaching your hair and 'going blonde'?

Bleach/lightening powder is the product and application process; blonde is the end result, which spans a full spectrum of shades depending on your natural pigment, skin tone, and how light you want to go — best left to a professional's judgement.

What should you do about the discomfort of small social interactions you keep avoiding (like asking someone for a favour)?

Josh frames it as a question of whether avoiding small interactions is you living life on your own terms or making decisions based on what you think others will feel, suggesting avoidance can snowball and sabotage bigger life goals if left unaddressed.

How can someone practice being more vulnerable?

Recognize that vulnerability is an action, not a trait — it requires pushing yourself into discomfort (not mere physical discomfort, but genuine emotional stretch). Practices like meditation or walking that ground you and get you out of your head make it easier to access vulnerability.

How can creators avoid burning out while working on passion projects?

Set explicit personal rules (e.g., no screens in bed, check email only once a day), remove temptations (get snacks out of the house), avoid working when your partner is home or on weekends, and recognise that burnout creeps in gradually as edges blur rather than from one big cause.

How do you know when to quit a project versus push through burnout?

Treat intense work periods as a defined 'sprint' tied to a clear goal (like finishing a documentary or hitting a sustainable income), and know in advance when to pump the brakes once that goal is reached rather than immediately starting the next grind.

What should you do if you get hit with a debt collector notice unexpectedly?

Call the company directly and push back, even if offended, since being handed to a debt collector over a single missed/recent bill without a prior call is excessive; check review sites like Trustpilot before signing up with a provider.

How can you impress people without extensive general knowledge?

Learning specific, situational details (like local history, a few phrases of a language, or niche terminology in a particular culture or hobby) can be used strategically to connect with or impress people in specific contexts.

How can you avoid making bad decisions when emotional in a meeting or conversation?

Take the emotional intensity down by about 10% in the moment, resist acting on it immediately, and step away to gather your thoughts before responding — this tends to lead to better long-term outcomes even though acting on raw emotion feels more immediately satisfying.

What should you consider before taking on a client meeting you have doubts about?

If you already feel uneasy about working with a client before the meeting even happens, it's worth reconsidering whether to take the meeting at all, since that discomfort is likely to surface and derail the conversation anyway.

Should you take breaks from consistent content creation/work?

Consistency matters but setting unrealistic pressure to never stop can lead to burnout; it's okay to deliberately slow down periodically, though this advice is most appropriate once you've already built sufficient momentum/runway.

How should you decide whether to MC a friend's wedding if it gives you anxiety?

Tommy suggests it's okay to say no to MCing even for a close friend if it causes significant anxiety, acknowledging it can feel selfish but noting that a good MC should focus on the couple rather than their own performance, so being honest about your limits can lead to a better outcome for the event.

What's the correct technique to avoid splashback when using a urinal?

Aim for a curved surface rather than a flat/straight wall, or go low/at an angle, since hitting a straight wall head-on (like a water pistol hitting a flat surface) causes the stream to bounce straight back.

How do I know if a therapist is right for me?

Mark suggests you can usually tell within minutes of meeting someone whether you'll connect with them, and building rapport is essential—if it's not there, it's worth trying someone else rather than persisting.

Should I give a new service provider (therapist, trainer, etc.) more than one try?

Tommy references the idea (from a book he was reading) that you should try something at least twice, since the first interaction simply builds understanding while the second truly tests the fit.

How can you tell if hunger is affecting your mood?

Notice patterns like reluctance to go out, defaulting to easy options (e.g., Uber Eats) instead of making decisions, and increased irritability — then plan to eat earlier to avoid it.

How should you approach losing your hair/balding?

Tommy suggests that if you're clearly holding on to thinning hair for dear life, you should just shave it off and embrace it, rather than trying to comb over or disguise it.

How do you build a sustainable meditation practice that actually changes your mindset long-term?

Consistency matters more than any single session — meditating briefly once a week produces different results than 20 minutes twice daily; repeating the practice creates a kind of neural adaptation that makes gratitude, empathy, and presence come more naturally over time.

How do you create 'authentic' content?

Define authenticity as what genuinely interests and connects with you first; if it resonates with you, trust that it will also resonate with others, rather than performing a buzzword version of authenticity.

How should you think about being vulnerable in your content?

Recognize that vulnerability is different for every person and that performing a 'vulnerable' persona for an audience isn't automatically the same as genuine vulnerability — real vulnerability often shows up in private, difficult conversations rather than public performance.

How do I manage anxiety or panic attacks?

Use breathing techniques to calm down, learn to recognise the onset of the 'fog' before it takes hold, avoid Googling specific disease symptoms (like MS) but do research anxiety itself, and remind yourself that anxiety itself can't physically hurt you.

How can someone improve as a partner when faced with feedback or new topics they initially resist?

Tommy describes shifting his habitual response from an automatic 'no' to new ideas toward asking 'tell me why' or 'what's your angle,' listening to the other person's perspective before dismissing it.

How do I create real connection with an audience when speaking or podcasting?

Share your own flaws, failures and insecurities alongside any strategic advice; speak experientially rather than just repeating what you read in a book, and use humour and stories to create emotional connection rather than trying to appear flawless.

How do you avoid toxic emotional reliance in friendships?

Be aware of when a friendship dynamic shifts into emotional reliance, set clear boundaries, and communicate changes directly rather than letting unspoken expectations build up.

How should I approach having a hard conversation?

Treat hard conversations like a practice or game to build a 'quota' of comfort with discomfort, rather than avoiding them; address issues early rather than waiting until backed into a corner, since prioritizing your own time/needs early prevents bigger problems later.

How can I build tolerance for discomfort or rejection?

Deliberately seek out small rejections or uncomfortable situations (like asking strangers for favours, or taking cold showers) to build mental toughness over time.