The Hirsute Guys

Josh: The Daily Talk Show. It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 885.

Peter: What's happening? What's going on, guys? It's weekend banter.

Jess: Peter Shepherd, you did so well.

Josh: Beautiful job.

Peter: Jess and GB in the house.

Josh: We do. And, uh, thank you, Tommy. Pete is, uh, standing in for TJ, who is on Annual leave. Pete, can I just say your hair is looking extremely shiny. What sort of conditioner do you use?

Peter: It's long. This is actually straight out of the ocean. So, I had a swim about an hour and a half ago. So, I think it's just salt water and there's no other, there's no other trick. It's just a lot of salt water.

Josh: People pay good money for that type of hair, that salt water. Like, you can get the spray.

George: The spray.

Peter: It's out of control. It is out of control. My hair, I haven't had a haircut in almost 4 months. And my head feels like it weighs, you know, like 15 kilograms. It's so annoying.

George: 4 months for me, my hair would be twice that length, at least.

Peter: It's pretty long. I think it's well kept under the headphones. It's like, it's very long.

George: It's great.

Josh: I mean, you seem to be able to shave, though, Pete. What do you think you'd look like if you didn't shave during that time?

Peter: You mean shave my beard?

Josh: Yes.

Peter: Yeah, I think I would be like real spotty, probably a little bit ginger. Like, it'd be shocking. It would be awful. It wouldn't look like a nice, thick, luscious beard. It would just be this spotty mess of a thing.

Josh: I've seen the— Have you seen on Instagram they're selling those little wheel things that it like pricks you and apparently it grows hair on the patches?

Peter: No, that's outrageous. Yeah. Yeah.

Josh: I don't know if it follows—

George: Is there like a serum or anything to like pop in or?

Josh: I just don't know. I just don't buy any of this stuff because even like some of the biggest names in Hollywood have tried to fix their hair problems. Ashton Kutcher, he had a— He went to a doctor to try and fix his hair growth issues. Even the best, you know, all of these people who have the most amount of money can't fix hair loss issues. So, what hope do we have?

Peter: Ashley Martin, are they not a solid solution? Is that the Paul Crawford one? I think so. I don't know. I just remember the name Ashley Martin from TV.

Josh: Yeah. No, I don't know. Like, they're all— They all have their risks. Apparently, when with one of them in particular, it plays with your testosterone. And so, then it like lowers it a bunch. And then for a year after you go off it, you're all fine. And then you start to lose it. And so—

Peter: Do you think, GB and Josh, are you at risk of going bald? Is that something to be mindful of in the future? Jess, you're obviously excluded.

Josh: GB, you go first.

Jess: I have a receding hairline.

George: You know what? My dad has actually got a solid head of hair.

Peter: Nice.

George: So, I think I'm okay. It is a bit grey. That's okay. I'm happy with grey.

Josh: Grey's great. I mean, yeah, I'd love to go grey. Yeah, I don't know. I've always had a far back hairline. When I was 14, the hairdresser asked if my dad was bald and I said yes. And she said, have all of the crazy hairstyles while you can.

Peter: Oh, no.

Josh: Yeah. And so, I don't know.

Jess: How sad.

Josh: Yeah, it is.

George: My hairline is slightly receding though, I reckon. Like it goes pretty far back.

Josh: Maybe we should do what, you know, when you're a kid and you're growing and you put a line on sort of the doorframe. Maybe we should be doing a little permanent marker just to see how far back it's going. On the forehead.

Jess: You could try that.

Josh: Yeah.

Peter: Yeah. I don't know.

Josh: I mean, what are the things that you have to worry about, Jess? We've got the whole hair loss thing and remembering your mic technique on today's show.

Jess: It's just like, it's super patronising, Josh, stop.

Josh: No, no. But I just, we just can't hear you when you're like this.

Jess: I like that though.

Josh: Yeah, a little bit, a little bit. Yeah, no, what are you— what's your biggest concern? If it's hair loss for us, what's on your mind?

Jess: I'd probably have to say hair loss in a different way, thinning of your hair. Like the ends of my hair is really thin and I'm trying to grow it out. I'm trying to look after it. So I haven't really touched a hair straightener in like over a year, just like special occasions or like special work things and that kind of thing. I know, baby steps. What else? I mean, just like, you know, your general waxing kind of things, like you just need to be, you know, on top of that. Yeah. Yeah.

Josh: Have you ever waxed your eyebrows, Josh?

George: No, no.

Josh: When I was a kid, I didn't have eyebrows. There's a fun fact.

Peter: Really?

Josh: What do you mean? I just didn't have eyebrows. I'll put up a photo on Instagram just for a very long time. I never had eyebrows. And so glasses, it looked great wearing glasses because it covered the fact that if you took them off, no eyebrows.

Peter: When did you grow eyebrows?

Josh: I don't know.

Jess: You've got a pretty thick set right now.

Josh: Yeah. I mean, they're nowhere near sort of the thickness of, say, Tommy Jacket or someone like that. But they're, I think they suit me in that regard. But no, I think you've got great brows.

George: Thank you.

Peter: Yeah. Yeah.

George: Really nice.

Jess: Geebee, you've got some good ones there too.

Josh: Yeah, they're pretty thick.

George: Like, yeah, Mum used to wax them for me.

Josh: Wow, really?

George: In here? Yeah.

Jess: The middle?

George: Yeah, in there and under, like under there.

Peter: Ah, did it hurt?

George: Yeah, well, plucking hurts. Like, like, Han will pluck my eyebrows, like, just like, you know, and that, ah, that hurts. But waxing isn't too bad because it's just like one go of that. Yeah.

Josh: And so, how often was your mum doing this? Was it sort of like, okay, we're going to go get new school uniforms for the year, GB, we need to do your eyebrows.

George: Whenever I go back up to Byron, it's— we have a like a facial day and she'll—

Jess: Beauty session.

Peter: Beauty session.

George: This is great. And she'll do my eyebrows and like give me— get all my pores out and stuff. But yeah, no, it was probably, yeah. Couple of times a year, I reckon, when I was at school. Oh, wow. Because my friend, like, who had bigger eyebrows, he shaved his at school, shaved them down the middle. And that's a bad, bad thing to do because then they just grow back thick and fast.

Peter: Yeah. Then you got the monobrow and you don't want that at school.

George: Yeah.

Josh: Pete, do you remember the first time you shaved?

Peter: Not specifically, other than it was probably only a couple of weeks ago because I don't get that hairy. No, I think I probably did it just because I wanted to and not that I actually needed to. I just, because everyone, I feel like I was, I was probably a little bit of a late bloomer in terms of puberty. So, I probably shaved before I needed to just to sort of feel part of the crew.

Josh: Sure.

Peter: And I'm pretty sure I do, I definitely remember having little bits of tissue because I cut myself, you know. So, you've got to get the little tissues and dab that and sort of be like.

Josh: I remember hearing about you actually need to shave if you want it to grow.

Peter: Yeah, yeah, I think that's why I started. Yeah.

Josh: And so I remember doing that, and I distinctly— one of the only times— this is not— this is no joke, I've mentioned this on the show, GB probably remembers— one of the few times that I prayed to God. Do you remember this, GB?

George: I don't remember that bit. Okay, no.

Josh: So the first, like, the one of the only times I ever prayed to God was, please God, give me pubes. Because I just remember, I just remember, I remember like it was, it was such a thing in school where like I really was playing golf and I remember my friend at the time, Lachlan, would just dak himself to show his pubes and run around the golf course. And I remember I was just horrified at the thought that I didn't have pubes.

Peter: I feel like there was a lot of pressure growing up. I remember like one of the biggest insults at the school I went to, at least, was you could be called a skinner, which meant that you didn't have pubes. And it was like, you don't want to be called or found out to be a skinner. Like, it was a lot of pressure.

Josh: I know TJ still uses that phrase today. I'm not even joking. And I believe he used it at his school. But yeah, there was— But I remember when it came to shaving, I shaved my chin. And rather than doing the motion where you sort of extend your chin to give it a flat surface, I knew that you had to do something, but I wasn't sure what it was. And so, I scrunched up my chin like that. And then, I was— I remember using my mum's disposable, you know, like the orange disposable razors and just like without any fucking— with anything, just like basically just cutting into my face going, "I hope it grows." It's a bit of a nightmare.

George: Jeez.

Jess: What about the Skinners? I don't know why. Why do you think it? What did you want to impress each other by?

Josh: I think it was just you couldn't level up in life, it felt at the time. And so, like, anything, because it felt this was my perspective anyway, sex and like, you know, head. That's what we like. It used to be head, like, have you got a head? You know, you don't really say say head anymore, do we? But it was that thing of like getting head was like a huge— I just remember just like going to parties and you just hear storeys like, yeah, like Adam just got head. I was like, what the fuck? Why is everyone getting head? I want head. But I just remember I was like, I can't get head until I have pubes. I think it was like a fair assumption. I don't think that like I was ready.

Jess: It's funny because I feel like from the other perspective, the girls would have just been like, "Oh, fuck's sake, there's pubes everywhere." They would have seen yours and they would have been like, "Yes." Yeah, this is what—

Josh: Yeah, I was just ahead of my time, you know. But yeah, I do. The funny thing is that I had no hair on my chest or anything, and now I'm a pretty hirsute guy. Hirsute.

Jess: What is that word?

Josh: A hairy word. Only a hairy person would know it.

Peter: Outrageous word to just casually use.

Josh: Hirsute. Yeah, it's a good one. And, you know, so as a hirsute guy, I like to think that the one time I did ask God for help, God, he or she, whoever God is, helped me.

Peter: Answered.

George: Yeah.

Jess: Answered.

Peter: Wow.

Josh: Yes. Yes.

Jess: Just Googling it. It's H-I-R-S-U-T-E. But you reckon it's because of it, like, it looks like a hair suit? Hair suit.

Josh: I don't know.

George: Hair suit.

Peter: I like it.

Jess: That's where it's derived from.

Josh: I don't know. It feels too literal. I feel like people are either, they like hirsute men or they don't. Jess, are you bothered By hair, or are you okay?

Jess: I'm okay.

George: She loves it. I thought you—

Jess: Yeah.

George: Don't you like it?

Jess: Hair on your face?

Josh: Sure.

George: Chest?

Jess: Yeah. Yeah, whatever.

Peter: What about back chest? Does it get weird if there's back hair?

Jess: The back hair is contentious, isn't it? It's like, it's— Gotta be weird. I hate having these conversations with you guys because I never know if I'm going to offend someone.

Josh: Look, I mean, I'm fine with it.

Jess: It's a pretty big chance with 3 guys.

Josh: Look, there's— I definitely have hair on my back. I'm a hair back guy. But I understand, like, Bri has— her feedback is that it can tickle her face at times if she's being the big spoon, which is annoying, which I understand is annoying. But then it's— I'm not going to call it shit SOP. But so how much do you actually want someone spending? Do you really want your significant other, Jess, spending more time than you on, you know, all of these things? Upkeep?

Jess: Yeah, probably not.

George: No.

Jess: I would probably prefer them not to if they had the back hair. Okay. This is a contentious question as well. Shaving up here.

Josh: So, you're pointing to your, like, the collarbone?

Jess: Your chest region.

Josh: Well— I mean—

Jess: No, like your voice chest.

Josh: Oh, like the full chest.

Jess: Yeah.

Josh: I don't know.

Peter: Nah.

Josh: I mean, I just feel like, yeah, I don't think it's necessary. Pete, have you ever even had to worry about that?

Peter: No, I think as the hirsute man in this conversation, you're probably the only one who has to worry. I've got, you know, little, a bit like we talked about with my beard or non-existent beard. I've got little bits and pieces of like little black hairs here and there, but it's nothing that's even remotely worth shaving.

Josh: Yeah.

Peter: Nothing to write home about.

Josh: What about you, GB? I feel like you would be a secret hirsute man.

George: Look at that look. I've got about, I've got, I think, 3 nipple hairs.

Josh: Does Mum look after them as well? Is that why you're just waiting?

George: Hannah will get rid of them every now and then. So, I got those. What else have I got? That's pretty much it. I think I've told this storey before, but Hannah's mum got me some shaving cream for my 21st birthday. Just a little tube, little tube of it. And by my 25th birthday, it had all been used and she got me a new one.

Josh: Yeah, I mean, I'm— I don't do a close shave. I don't do— I don't ever use a blade because I get the craziest amount of irritation. I've tried everything. I've tried oils. I've tried everything. What's everyone doing when it comes to shaving? Do you just use a beard trimmer to avoid that?

Peter: No, I'm a, like, I think pretty stock standard, but maybe not. Like, just the Gillette shaving cream with the Gillette sort of 3 razor, I think it is, thing.

Josh: Do you go up or down?

Peter: I go down, like down the cheek, but then when it's the neck, I go up. I'm sure this is riveting conversation.

Josh: I feel like it's sort of ingrown. You're asking for an ingrown. Have you ever had any ingrowns? Yeah.

Peter: Yeah, I have. I've definitely had an ingrown or two.

Josh: Yeah. I reckon I have them every single month. I have an ingrown and I like, I— What was that, Jess? What am I doing? I think it's just genetics.

Jess: Yeah. What do you think it is?

Josh: Well, so I think like I pulled out like a tuft of hair. Another good word, tuft. Only used with hair, isn't it? So, I pulled some hair out. And, uh, in one follicle I had like 4 hairs coming out of the single follicle. Um, and so I think that as a general thing, maybe this whole praying thing, I fucking— I doubled every hair in my follicles because it's just— I think that we've spoken previously about my issues with folliculitis. Haven't had it for a while, thanks. Are you across folliculitis, Jess?

Jess: No, I don't. I'll just— No, what is it?

Josh: It's infected follicles.

Jess: Yeah.

Josh: Look it up and look at Google Images.

Peter: Is she Googling it? Oh, no, this is going to ruin the day, Jess.

Josh: I've never had it that bad, probably, because they always lead with the worst on Google Images.

George: Always.

Josh: Yeah, just be careful. So, imagine sort of like a pimpley, sort of pimples on your head or whatever. That's— That's something that I have had to deal with, which is quite annoying.

George: I've had—

Josh: I have had antibiotics before.

Peter: Have you, GB, have you managed to sort out your situation that I heard the other day on the head?

George: Yeah, all good. Thanks, Pete. So basically, just checking in for people that don't know yet, I scrubbed my scalp and it can only be described as pastry falling on my head.

Josh: Oh, it's disgusting.

Peter: Makes my skin crawl. Me too.

Jess: I licked my mouth water.

Josh: My mouth waters. Is that the right word? It's like a sausage roll.

Jess: You want to gag?

Josh: Yeah. I feel like my mouth doesn't— I guess it does. Yeah. So go on, JB. And so is it all clear?

George: I think it's all clear. I've pretty much worn a hat every day since, but I just need to remember now when hairdressers open to give it a bit of a scrub before I go in.

Josh: Do you think you have to warn? It's always an issue when you have to warn the hairdresser of anything.

George: Yeah.

Peter: Have you ever been sent home from the hairdresser? I was sent home when I was a young kid because I had nits. Oh, wow. Yeah, head lice. So, I remember getting there, I had pretty long sort of mop top as a kid. I must have been, I want to say 14 or 15, you know, in that awkward, self-conscious kind of adolescent age. And she sent me home because she couldn't do it. And I was absolutely like crushed. Like, I was so embarrassed.

Josh: You had clean hair. Remember, that was the whole thing. It's like the people with the cleanest hair, Yeah. Get lice.

Peter: Yeah.

Josh: I don't know if that was just some propaganda to make people feel better.

Peter: I don't think it— That didn't help. I felt terrible. And then my mum had to, you know, do the washing thing and you get the comb and it's a whole process.

Josh: Yeah.

Jess: My mum got fly spray and she would just— I never got them, but my two sisters got them. And she— Emma has really, really thick hair and she— They weren't dying, so she literally fly sprayed them and would go through and like crush them with her fingers.

Josh: Oh my God, a lot of, a lot of cringeworthy chat, isn't there? Yeah, can I just, can I say, um, uh, we, we used our Woolworths online. Oh yeah, uh, Bree was saying Coles online, they need to do some work on their mobile experience, right? She's really struggling to order things. Uh, yeah, anyway, so we ordered all of this stuff on Woolworths online. I am sold. So, first of all, we get ooshies. We got 6 ooshies.

Peter: Ooshie, I mean, you know, as the acting TJ, I just really have to emphasise how much I love ooshies.

Josh: It is good. Ooshies are great. And so, I will, I did, I did show, I did send, I did a Face, I was FaceTiming with Bodhi and I showed him the ooshies. There are some issues with the potentially the amount of plastic. I'm just going to say, like, not even in the ooshie itself, but the actual The wrapping per ushi is significant. Yeah. But it does, it does have— I was sort of, as I was showing them to Bodhi, I was like crumpling them because it always has this sort of tactility to it that I think would get kids pumped up because it's like, oh, like it's a packet of something. It's exciting. I'm just like grabbing it. He was very excited about that. But Woolworths, shout out, delivery person. Lovely. He actually came up to our apartment door with everything. He said, he said, "Will my truck be okay?" And look, it was in my best interest to say, "Yeah, yeah, it'll be fine. Come up." So, hopefully, he didn't get towed or anything. I don't think in these times you would, like, you know what? They're not giving a Woolworths, a ticket to a Woolworths truck.

Peter: So, he got in the elevator and went up. That's a great service.

Josh: So, all the way there, because Bri was on a meeting. And so, I'm like, I'm going to go downstairs and get it all. And so, classic, the one time where I have to, the one time where I was like, my opportunity to bring them all up. It's like, how have we ended up with the guy? I'm like, thanks so much, mate. And just like grabbing it. Bri's like, oh, no, he's here. It's great. Oh, did you ask him? I was like, sort of. Anyway, so we We got them. But that's not the best part of the story. The best part of the storey is that Woolworths, you get like a, they call it a personal shopper or whatever, that's gotten all of your groceries. Food. The, yes, the personal shopper just gives you gifts. So, we're like, oh, hang on, we didn't order this. And it's got a sticker on it. It's like, with compliments from—

Peter: No way.

Josh: From your personal shopper. And so, what was it? Do you know who you're supposed to call Bruce? Not sure. I wish I did. But what we got, and I use them, it's sort of disgusting how I use them, actually. So, I haven't— So, what it was was an odor, like a foam that you spray on furnishings, on carpet, and it just makes it smell amazing.

Peter: Nice.

Josh: Right. Have you guys used this stuff before?

Peter: No, but it sounds like it would be useful for your couch.

Josh: Yeah, well, yes, but the couch is all fine now.

Jess: It's a show.

Josh: No, but I actually, I used it last night because I was like, I haven't done— I've been really bad with washing. It's just so easy. Like, how are you guys going with washing?

Peter: Fine. I'm okay.

Josh: Gee, surely you're not fine. Hannah, does it?

George: Hannah does it. Yeah, she's in charge of that. She does it on weekends. But personally, yeah, I've been wearing the same shirt like 3 days in a row.

Josh: Yeah, sure.

Peter: And so, maybe that's—

George: Yeah.

Josh: Well, so the thing is it's got nothing to do with his head, if that's what you're implying, Pete.

Peter: No, no, no, no. I was going to say— No, it's the whole thing.

George: Don't worry.

Peter: Keep going.

Josh: Keep going. Good filtering. But the— No, my— I have— What's my type of shirt that I wear? They always talk about merino. I haven't spoken about merino wool in a while. So, all of these. So, Jess, this top here is a merino wool shirt. This one's quite a thick one. It's really nice. But the merino t-shirts I wear, and you can wear them for— What's funny, G-Man?

Peter: He's lost it.

George: It's funny. I don't know. She's like, Do you remember how much— About a year ago you were saying all this stuff and now you're bringing it back. It's quite funny.

Josh: Yeah.

Peter: Moisture wicking. Moisture wicking.

Josh: Moisture wicking. It's a huge thing. And so, when I travelled, I only had a few t-shirts because it was all merino wool and you can wear them for like 30 days without washing them. They do a phenomenal job.

Peter: That doesn't seem right.

Josh: No, it works.

Jess: What does moisture wicking actually mean, though?

Josh: Don't ask.

Peter: I don't know.

Jess: No, but like, where is it going?

Josh: I know, but it's used by, you know, like, it's very big in sort of the nomad lifestyle. It's like you have a few and you rinse them and all that sort of thing. Anyway, I haven't been good. My t-shirts, I can wear them a lot, but I don't have the same style when it comes to shorts. And so, my shorts always see they're used by way earlier. Than any of my t-shirts. And so, I had a walk with you, Jess. And so, before the walk, Bree's like, you don't have any shorts to wear. And so, I got the odour spray foam and foamed my shorts instead of washing them. And it smelt like mango. I was like, this is amazing. Why does anyone bother wash it? Like, this was up and ready. Within 10 minutes.

Peter: Was it like— I don't understand.

Josh: So, if you imagine, so this is the thing. If it's good enough, if it's good enough for your couch, if it's good enough for furnishings.

Peter: Yeah.

Josh: What do we like really—

George: Yeah, you're never washing those.

Josh: Yeah, but that is true, George. But the other thing too is what's between a couch And your asshole.

Jess: Clothes, underwear.

Josh: Yeah. And so, that's the whole thing. So, it's like, if you think about it, if you're sitting on a couch, we don't do anything for the couch. But if this odourless spray, if this is a thing that works, if it works on the couch, the reason why we do it is for the thing that the the shorts are getting hit on as well. And so by spraying the shorts, by spraying the shorts, I got rid of the odour completely. Like, the— not that it smelled, but I was just like, I want— you want it to smell like laundry. I was like, fuck, this smells like laundry.

George: That's—

Peter: it feels a little—

Josh: guys, thank you.

George: More words.

Josh: Thank you.

Peter: I mean I have a lot of questions, but the personal assistant, the personal shopper. I was at my local little grocery store on the weekend. It wasn't a Coles or a Woolworths, and I sort of was— there was a lady with a trolley with an iPad, and I was kind of like, oh, can I— I couldn't get around her. She was taking up a lot of room. And then I realized, oh, she's one of them. She's a personal shopper with the person's order on an iPad, and she was packing their bags. And I was like, why? I'm in here like a sucker. I just need to send it to her.

Josh: And I've seen, it's very interesting because it's big in the US. They actually have car parks just for personal shoppers. So, it's not even organised by the supermarket. So, there's like, just like with, you know, you've got Uber and all that sort of thing. There's just people who, you know, on an app have to do it. And so, they get these prime spots. You know how in Australia we've got like pram, you know, spots for prams. In the States, they have spots for personal shoppers. But the level of detail, I remember seeing a personal shopper and just checking all of the avocados. And I thought, oh, that there, like, that's the sort of personal shopper that you want.

Peter: That's what I want.

Josh: And so, I thought it was a very good way. Can I just say, very clever. Of Woolworths, I'm sure that they have— Do you reckon? Do you think, Jess? I've stopped saying, do you reckon? Because, Jess, you pick up that I say, I reckon, a lot. So, I'm trying to change that, not use the word reckon.

Peter: Yeah, I get it.

Josh: Do you think? I get it. Well done.

Jess: There's another one.

Peter: Jess.

Jess: Outrageous.

Josh: Jess, outrageous. Yes. Do you think that Woolworths would be doing this internally where they have a sampling team? Or do you think that there's an agency that's along alongside Woolworths that is looking after the sampling of, say, the odourless spray.

Jess: Yeah, I was thinking, I actually don't know the answer to it, but I was thinking that your shopper teams in like ad agencies would be doing something along those lines, or Dior Beauty does it. And so it's a matter of like, they must buy the stock and then they would get samples as like a bonus add-on or something just to begin promoting. I only now buy things on Adore Beauty if I get a really good gift.

Peter: You get a Tim Tam. Do you get a Tim Tam still?

George: Yeah.

Jess: You get a Tim Tam. Yeah. But yeah.

Josh: Because how do you know what the gift's going to be?

Jess: Well, you can see it.

Josh: It tells you.

Jess: It looks like a page and it says if you spend X amount, you'll get this in either the hair care or the skincare or whatever, or this brand. So I wonder if that's exactly what's happening there. It makes sense.

Peter: It's really good customer service and it creates a conversation like this. So, it's like, it's obviously, it's working.

Josh: But it doesn't feel like— So, Jess, what you're describing is a GWP, gift with purchase. Gift with purchase. Yeah. But I feel like this is slightly different than a GWP because it's completely random. You don't know that it's coming. But the other thing we got was a bag of magnesium. This isn't even a joke.

Jess: They definitely—

Peter: no way.

Josh: It's like they're planning. No wonder they gave me the spray and the magnesium. They've got the perfect combo. But because I was like, oh, we've gotten, we've gotten someone else's order. And then we saw the stickers of saying with compliments.

Peter: That can't be a coincidence. Surely someone—

Josh: someone you think's a Gronkh Has specifically asked. Yeah, well, they would, if there were a hardcore gronk, they would know that we don't have a bath and that the magnesium is a, is in like a crystal thing that I need to put in a bath.

George: It could just be the joke.

Jess: You could have like your feet in there.

Josh: Sure. Jess, I feel like you would have been a bath bomb gal at some point in your life.

Jess: I don't like sitting in my own filth.

Peter: You don't like baths?

Josh: Oh, just, you don't like sitting in your own filth? Please elaborate.

George: I don't care about your bath.

Josh: Yeah, how? Just imagine And then just the water goes black as soon as, just as soon as Jess sits in. I mean, yeah. What do you mean sitting in your own filth?

Jess: I am just not a massive, I'm not a bath person.

Josh: That's probably a better answer. If you're on a date and someone says, are you, do you like baths? I reckon skip the, I don't like sitting in my own filth and just go with that. I'm not the bath person.

George: Yeah.

Josh: So, you've never been a bath person?

Jess: No, I've had them before. Like, I had a few when I was boxing with magnesium because I had to, because I was just sore all over. But yeah, no, it's just kind of a—

Josh: I get hot.

Jess: It takes a lot for me to— Yeah, I get really hot and then you have to stick your legs out and then it gets cold all of a sudden.

Josh: You're like—

Peter: Well, the problem if it's getting cold, you're in for far too long, Jess. I think that's the— The caveat on a good bath is, you know, it doesn't need to be more than like 20 minutes. I think you want it to be hot, you want to get sweaty, you want to start to relax a bit, and then you get yourself out of there. I think it's great.

Josh: I get irritable with heat. And the worst thing is that I find that baths normally happen in like fancy hotels. And it's just like, it's that classic, you know.

George: That's gross, isn't it?

Josh: Which bit? Me being in a bath?

George: The fancy hotel baths. Like hotel baths. It's a bit not good.

Josh: Well, they feel to be—

Jess: They're bleaching it.

Josh: Yeah. To be honest, I don't like the smell of bleach. If I smell bleach, I feel like too many things have gone down. You know, like if it's— If it just smells fresh, it's all good. But the smell of bleach, I don't like. Shitty motels smell like bleach. Like Bri and I stayed at this one place. Uh, in the States it was just like ciggies, like stunk of ciggies, and then bleach. I was like, shit has just— and then as soon as I went into the bed, I was like, started itching. I'm like, I think there's fucking bed bugs. Oh no, no, it's just a nightmare, you know. Um, GB, before we started this, the show, you were on a phone call and I said, who are you speaking to? And you said, ah, keep it for the show.

Peter: It looked like a very important phone call.

George: Well, I was, you know, I'm like you, Josh. I'm terrible with admin and hate admin. And so, I literally only remembered to do this just before the show, but I thought, oh, good test. Because the other day you were talking about the voting, the elections coming up and you haven't changed your address. Yeah. And so, last night I went on the Australian Electoral Commission. Commission? Is that how you say it?

Peter: Yeah.

George: And put in my details and it only took 5 minutes. Changed my address, and then just then I gave someone a call at the Victorian one and they're posting out a new ballot.

Josh: Oh, so they will, yeah, I'll give them an applause.

Peter: That's got to be around the polls.

George: Even though you're meant to change your address by, I think, the 28th of August or something. So, well past that.

Josh: For those playing at home, we're in October.

George: So, And they like, do you think that I can like 10 days or something?

Josh: Could I contact them still, do you think?

George: Yeah, before 5 o'clock, give them a call.

Josh: No, today.

George: Hold it.

Josh: Could I do it?

George: Or you can throw it tomorrow.

Josh: Okay, great.

George: Let's wait.

Peter: Do you, do you get that like over overwhelming sense of just satisfaction having done that phone call? It's like, isn't it great?

George: And it only took like 5 minutes. I thought it was gonna be such a hassle. She was lovely. And she— so, just gave her my old address, gave her my new address, and so she'll post out the new.

Josh: So, I need to contact VicRoads first.

George: I still need to do that too. I haven't changed my address.

Josh: Oh, really? So, you haven't— your licence isn't right, but the electoral thing is?

George: Okay.

Josh: That's good to know that you can do that.

George: My old house must be getting so much mail. Like, I haven't changed anything.

Josh: I was thinking about that too.

George: Like, I went over there a few months ago. 6 months ago, I reckon. And for a year ago. Doesn't matter. Anyway, knocked on their door and they gave— They kept all our mail. They like had it all there ready for us.

Peter: And very nice of them.

George: Had this big handful of letters. Haven't been able to answer them.

Jess: But that's a major adult thing to do is to redirect your mail when you move.

Josh: Yeah.

Peter: You've got to do that.

Josh: I mean, that's why I like having the PO box. The PO box is great. But in my old address when I was a kid, I, you, like, I was doing signing up to everything on the internet when I was a kid. And like, I had so many— I used to have like 100 domain names, and, um, I never paid to have them private. And so my home address was always on there. And I would say that because the thing is that it's a big spam problem, because what happens is the domain registrars— so it's like that where you get your domain name from— there's a bunch of registrars. There's a bunch of dodgy, uh, dodgy ones that will send you letters saying, hey, you need to renew your domain name, but it's basically a transfer form. So it will go from whatever, you know, if you're with Venture IP, the other, other domain registrars will try and get you, get you to transfer. And so I, I think that the the old address where I used to live would, if I was to knock on their door, even though I haven't lived there since 2007, I think I could knock on the door and I say, I'm Josh Janson. And they would say, we've been waiting for you.

George: Yes. Yeah.

Peter: Or they'd punch you in the face and be like, yeah.

Josh: Yeah. It could go either way. Yeah, go on, Pete.

Peter: No, I was just gonna say, speaking of change of address, I've got a— I've got an exciting announcement.

Josh: Oh, here we go. Oh, I've got the applause ready.

Peter: Have you?

Josh: Yeah, yeah, go for it.

Peter: Well, in December I'm going to be moving in with Trace.

Josh: Oh, this is huge.

Peter: Oh, it's—

Jess: Congratulations.

Peter: Clap it in.

George: Thanks, guys.

Jess: Right, how long have you been—

Peter: It's a big deal. Well, actually, pretty similar to Seb's. I heard Seb's talking about him and Grace being there 6 months. Trace and I are just a bit past them. I think we're a few weeks beyond them. So, we're approaching sort of 7 months.

Josh: So, what— So, your lease, it will be your 12 months up, so you'll be able to leave, no problem?

Peter: Yeah, my lease is December, like late December. So, should be— And I signed a 12-month lease. So, the plan is to head on over there, which will be good.

Josh: And so, what furniture will stay? What will go? How is it all getting sort of transitioned?

Peter: I'm glad you asked. This has been— This is basically what's keeping me sane on a weekend. I'm project managing. Tracy and I are project managing the move. So, it's just like every weekend we just chip away. So, we bought a new king-size bed, which was pretty exciting, and got rid of our old. And so, I'll get rid of my bed and she got rid of her bed. And then, I've got— Actually, maybe we should do something with it through the show, but I've got the couch that you have, Josh, and TJ, the Marie. And it's not going to make it to the new house.

Josh: We've already—

Peter: Yeah.

Josh: So, what are you going to do with it? It is a great couch.

Peter: Yeah, I might sell it to a gronk.

Josh: Great. What are you asking?

Peter: Not sure yet. Haven't thought it through. I only just decided to talk about this now on air.

Josh: No, I get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, pick up—

Peter: So, the couch won't be coming. The couch won't be coming. That's available. The TV will be coming. There's a few bits and pieces. TV unit. TV unit will come. Yep, yep, yep. That's a good one. Most of the stuff Tracey already has, and then we're buying a few new bits and pieces. So, we bought a new island bench, we bought a new bed. It's all, it's very exciting.

Josh: Buying an island bench.

Peter: Custom made.

Josh: Wow.

Peter: Oh, wow. Facebook Marketplace. It's, it was easier and cheaper than anything.

Josh: Custom made and Facebook Marketplace. I don't know if they go together. It was like, you find crafted by someone on Facebook Marketplace.

George: No, no, no.

Peter: It's custom made. So, there's furniture makers that advertise themselves.

Josh: Some bloke?

Peter: Yeah, no, it was custom made for me.

Josh: Okay, that's good.

Peter: So there's furniture makers that advertise themselves on Facebook Marketplace.

Josh: And have you got it yet?

Peter: Yeah, it's brilliant. And then you, so you reach out to them, you give them all of your measurements. I'll send you a photo. It's just like a wooden island bench.

Josh: Yeah, how big?

Peter: And he made it, it was super, it was like really reasonable. He's a ripping guy.

Josh: Uh, how big are we talking?

Peter: So it's 110 high, we're talking 110 millimeters. Yeah, high. Millimeters, centimeters?

Josh: Centimeters.

Peter: Damn it, I almost pulled that off.

George: Yeah, yeah.

Josh: And then about 1,100 mils.

Peter: 1,100 mil and about 1,600 long, I think is about right.

Jess: Yeah.

Josh: So pretty long.

Peter: And then storage, probably 600 deep. And then a shelf on the, like, the width.

Josh: Okay. Yeah.

Peter: And then a shelf on the bottom for the pots and the pans. And it's great. It's, I mean, it's really changed the game.

Josh: It's got wheels?

Peter: No wheels. No, we didn't go with wheels.

Josh: Was it, could you have gotten wheels? Was it a—

Peter: I'm sure. I mean, it was custom made. I could have asked for anything, I think.

Josh: That's true.

George: I like that. I love that.

Josh: GB, before we started the show earlier today, you contacted me and said, hey, well, first of all, you said very just loosely, man, what's the deal with like recording people without them knowing? I was like, oh, like, I think, I think the law in Victoria is if you are one of the parties in a phone call, you can record the call. And then, so you then Slacked me a little bit later and said, now I've done some prank calls Am I allowed to play them? And so we've decided that we can't play them. But can you just talk us through what—

Peter: Yes.

Josh: Blow by blow, what you did, what the jokes were, and give us as much detail as possible.

George: Nothing more disappointing than someone describing a prank call that they made.

Josh: I've listened to it and they're great. They're great. It was a montage.

George: It was gold.

Peter: Yes.

Josh: Yeah.

George: Yeah. Yeah, well, it can be a little— I mean, yeah, maybe.

Josh: How about email, George? Yeah, no, what about this? Um, there's something in— no, so this is what we can do. You can send us, uh, you can call us.

Peter: Uh, we're starting a new podcast.

Josh: Yeah, no, no, so what you're going to do is you can, you can call us and on to be big media company and say, "I'm after George," with your phone number. And the big media company's phone number is +61, if you're in Australia, 03 9981 0408. If you leave a voicemail and saying, "I was after George," and you leave your number, George will call you back next week and play the audio through the phone.

George: I love this. I love this. And then if it's okay, I'll record your reaction with permission.

Josh: And so, GB, explain what happened just as a tease for people.

George: Well, so Tommy's on annual leave this week, obviously, and I went in with—

Jess: You didn't want to annoy him on his day off.

Josh: No, no, no.

George: No, you didn't. No, it was actually— I was— went in with good intentions. I was actually looking out for Tommy. Because he's on annual leave and we're in Melbourne and there's not much going on here, I thought, you know, Sebs did a great job on the show the other day, you know, Pete's here. When he comes back next week, maybe there won't be any work for him at Big Media Company. So I called a few places and basically said I was Tommy and asked, uh, how I would go about getting some work. Um, so I called I can say who I called?

Josh: Yeah, yeah, you can. Yeah, yeah, okay, great.

George: I called Channel 7 and I asked if there were— if they were planning on playing, uh, Super— what was it called?

Josh: Ultimate Sprint Cars.

George: Ultimate Sprint Cars. If they were going to play that this year on Seven, which was Tommy—

Josh: which was the show that Tommy, uh, hosted.

George: Tommy was a presenter on that show, so I was just saying like, do you reckon— is there any gigs going around for that show? Are you going to be playing that?

Josh: And you said you were Tommy. So you—

George: yeah, I was Tommy. Yeah, that was Tommy.

Peter: Yeah.

Josh: So you called—

George: then I called 7-Eleven and basically asked if they could give me any hints on any products coming in so I can get ready for the next viral video. Um, and then I called Fitness First in Brisbane and, and asked if I could, uh, have a job there because I used to be PT and I'm moving up to Brisbane. Everyone on the phone was very lovely. They were very helpful.

Josh: And so, you spoke to me, and then I called a bunch of my mates who deal with prank calls a lot. One of them is Marshy. Marshy is the audio superstar behind Hamish and Andy. He's the main audio guy that produces their stuff. And so, I said, what's the deal, Marshy? He was saying it was a little bit risky, probably not worth the risk. But he said you could call, like what they normally do with pranks is they call up and ask for permission. And so, you said, hey, I'm happy to call and ask for permission. How did you go with asking for permission?

George: So, the first one I called 7-Eleven and—

Jess: Who at 7-Eleven though? Was it just a store or was it—

George: No, it was like the head office. So, lovely lady who I talked to on the call, she was nice, but she didn't give me a name, so I couldn't ask for her back. So I basically just had to just—

Josh: what did you say?

George: I just said, hey, I called up about an hour ago pretending to be Tommy. It was a prank call for a podcast, uh, and I was just calling to see if I get permission basically, but I don't know who I spoke to. And then the lady was like, okay, well, I'll put you through to customer service and we'll just hope for the best, I guess. And then she's like, good luck with it. And then a guy answered and he pretty much shut me down. He said, "Mm, nah, they're pretty strict about this sort of stuff, so it's probably going to be a no." And I said, "Okay, that's fine." And then I called Channel 7, and she was just heaps confused and put me onto a few different people and ended up talking to them for like 8 minutes or something. I was like, "Oh, this is not worth it." But then she, um—

Josh: Who did you speak to there?

George: I can't remember her name.

Josh: It would have been like the switchboard or whatever from hearing the audio, and the people who run the switchboard at these networks are used to idiots. Like, they get— so like, I remember just when we were recording at Channel 10, when we had Scott Tweedy on the show in Sydney, and sitting down and just within the 10 minutes that we were in reception, the types of calls that were coming through to reception, just like, no, sorry, you can't, you know, you can't speak to this person. No, that— nah, no, we can't give you a direct line to to Oshoginsburg.

George: So I think I actually—

Jess: PR.

George: Yeah, I think I actually called Seven West Media, which was based in Western Australia. Yeah, I don't know how, because I was trying to call the Ultimate Sprint Cars.

Josh: Sure. And so then, so, uh, what did, um, what did they say?

George: Yeah, she was really nice and she said, um, she asked about the podcast and she said she would tune in. So that's nice. Yeah, she loves podcasts.

Josh: And what about Fitness First?

George: Funny, Fitness First, the girl was really nice. She, she was, um, she loved it. She loved the idea.

Josh: What'd she say?

George: She said yes for sure. But then she's like, oh, did Fitness— did— is it— can you hear Fitness First, like the branding in there? And I said, yeah, sort of about that. And, um, I can't— I don't really have— like, I can't really give permission for that. So that's fine. But, um, but she's going to listen too, so Uh, yeah, a couple of listeners.

Jess: At least we've got 2 new subscribers.

George: That's nice.

Peter: This is perhaps a new strategy to grow the audience, get GB on the phones.

Josh: But like, it's essentially sales at this point. How do you feel, GB, about doing at least a prank a week with an influential brand, and then you call them up straight away and say, how's a prank for one of the biggest podcasts in Australia, The Daily Talk Show? Yeah, is this something you could do?

George: Happy to do that. The calling back bit was more nerve-wracking, definitely.

Josh: Oh yeah, because you actually—

George: before it, I was Tommy and I was just like, you know, being silly. But when you're calling back, you're like, hey guys, sorry, I was just pulling a prank on my friend.

Peter: That entire process sounds so anxiety-inducing to me, JB.

Josh: I like—

Peter: I can't stand phone calls. The fact that you did that for fun just makes me I'm just— I don't even know. I can't understand.

Josh: It was a good job. What about this, JB? If you work towards episode 1000 playing your first ever prank in the show, so you can, you can work from now until February next year on getting the best prank, get permission, and then you hold on to it and you can present it on Epithausen. Does that sound— and it gives us time to work out the legal stuff.

George: That's great, I love that.

Josh: Okay, good. That'd be great. Um, well, good, good work. I know you put in a lot of—

George: I mean, that was probably boring for people just hearing like someone describe a prank.

Josh: Well, they can, they can give us a call and they say, calling for George, 03 9981 0408. Give us your phone number and GB will call you next week with the prank. Uh, great. Uh, thank you, Pete, for, uh, co-hosting and, uh, filling in for TJ. Thanks for having me. Thank you, Jess. Thank you, GB. Enjoy the rest of your Saturday, everyone, and we'll see you tomorrow. Have a good one.

Peter: See you guys.