Dating Coach D'Avella

Matt: The Daily Talk Show.

Josh: It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 667.

Tommy: Matt D'Avella, welcome back to the show, brother.

Matt: Feels good to be here. Thank you so much.

Tommy: Hey, what's that? What's that jumper you got on? That looks familiar. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

Matt: Represent Daily Talk Show, baby.

Josh: It's like the—

Matt: I only got two hoodies. That's one of them.

Tommy: I mean, we, we were worried in the car when we gave it to you when we were in LA last year. We drove home, we thought surely that's going in the bin seeing as he's a minimalist, or he's at least giving it away to, you know, the salvos.

Matt: I like you guys that much that I held on to it because of the guilt.

Tommy: Yeah, that's most presents. And when you have a child, you just end up having so much shit because you don't want to throw it out. You feel guilty because people have dropped their hard-earned cash. Uh, but mate, you're in LA. How are you? What's the vibe in Los Angeles?

Matt: Feeling pretty good. I, I mean, it's been weird. It's, uh, obviously, uh, it's a very strange time. Uh, definitely getting used to living at home and only getting outside for a walk around the neighbourhood once a day. We went to the grocery store for the first time in 3 weeks, and it was, uh, yeah, it was, it was much different than the last time that I went because like the last time I went it was right before the lockdown and all the craziness happened. Uh, people weren't social distancing yet, and, you know, everybody was wearing a mask today. They had, uh, kind of a system for getting in line and making sure nobody was next to each other. Still, people weren't really taking it— like, I would say there's probably about 15% of people, 10% of people that weren't taking it seriously at all and like breathing down your neck in line. Uh, but for the most part, I'm seeing most people take it seriously.

Josh: Talking about guilt What are you— as a bit of a fun one, what are you guilty about at the moment?

Matt: What am I guilty about? Um, a lot of video games lately. I don't know if I feel guilty about it though. I'm just letting myself go and I'm enjoying it. Uh, a lot of snacks that are just kind of getting me through this right now. And, you know, playing Call of Duty Warzone literally probably 2 hours a day, which is a lot for me. And, uh, You know, I just, just enjoying life, man.

Tommy: Well, the backbone of your YouTube channel is your biceps, and how are they holding up? Can we get an official statement from Matt DiVella's biceps, uh, you know, in this time?

Matt: I got the hoodie on, so you can't really see. Yeah, I mean, it was, it was for the first 2 weeks, it was a struggle. And actually then I started to get nervous because I'm like, okay, gym's officially closed, can't go to the gym. And then you start to think like, uh, you know, there's not many at-home bicep workouts, right? So I had to think, what can I do in exchange of that? And, uh, so it's like I'm trying to lift chairs and benches around my house and heavy objects. Uh, it didn't work as well. I ended up just getting a resistance band ordered and I just got it in. So that's, that's been doing the job. I'm actually impressed with these resistance bands.

Josh: What does all this stuff mean to YouTubers and like revenue and things like that?

Matt: I think it's too early to tell in terms of revenue whether it will make a significant, significant difference. I haven't seen with, you know, people who sponsor channels, I haven't seen that slow down much. And obviously there's some brands where, uh, that, that are all online and all digital where it would make sense to just continue to do the same thing, if not a little bit more. I have heard from some brands who are like, hey, we really want to do something positive at this time to help and give back and do something shed a little bit of light on a bad situation. How can we do good? And, uh, I have actually just personally found it a weird and difficult thing to kind of navigate. And, um, I don't love talking about it. I'm talking about my personal experience, but then everybody's going through this, so you're kind of caught between this place of you want to talk about it because if you don't, it's weird. It's really strange if you don't.

Josh: Is it too mainstream for you? Is that the problem?

Matt: Well, you know what, I think what I said, it's not that it's mainstream. As much as like I really value originality and like, you know, to do something specifically about it is, it's not going to be very original. So I tried to like figure out a way that I could maybe help people talk about my own anxieties, the stress that I've gone through, some of the things that I'm doing to organise my daily routines and habits. And like, you kind of feel selfish talking about it as well because you're like, what the hell do my habits mean? Like, People are going through some serious shit right now. But at the same time, it's like, if we take care of ourselves, then we're gonna be able to be there for our family and friends. And, you know, obviously it's affecting a lot of people. And I don't like talking about serious stuff either. I know you guys don't love talking about serious shit.

Tommy: No, we've actually, since you've been on the show, we're a completely serious show. We cover serious topics in a serious manner.

Matt: Okay, that's good.

Tommy: Yeah.

Matt: Well, I'm here for it.

Tommy: A mate of mine just posted—

Josh: Where's "here for it" come from, by the way? Is this a— Where is here for it?

Matt: Like, I'm here for it. I don't know, is it an American term? We don't have that.

Tommy: We've just called it something.

Matt: It's—

Tommy: but we want to— where's the reference? We're trying to work out because it is referencing—

Josh: can you look that up?

Matt: I thought I invented it. I thought I was being original. I'm so high, I can't keep this hoodie on.

Mason: I mean, this is—

Matt: I didn't hit the steam either. You guys might— you guys mind if I, uh, yeah, yeah, take it off.

Tommy: We'll put some sexual music on. Here we go. Dear fellas, do doing a live strip show for us.

Josh: I can play some. Here we go, here we go.

Tommy: And he's taking it off. This is their first dance.

Matt: Oh wow, this is—

Tommy: can you give it a spritz of that smoke in the back?

Josh: The steam?

Matt: Yeah, I got it. I don't know if you can see it, there's too many— there's not enough pixels to really make it out. You know what's been tough? I'm— I think it's enough. The smoke alarm's gonna go off.

Josh: Um, shut it down.

Matt: How are you guys doing with haircuts?

Tommy: I luckily got one a couple of weeks ago and so I'm riding it out. Sev's, your hair's looking all right.

Mason: Josh, you said you didn't get it. Yeah, I got one right before.

Josh: Mine's a nightmare, but my hair's always been a nightmare. It's like businesses that were already in trouble. Like I was, my hair was never good.

Tommy: Dave Vella, a friend of mine, posted something around financial buffer is not a luxury, it's a necessity. And you know, you've talked a lot about your personal finances from your student debt and, you know, different time of your life that you're in now. As he waves the smoke out of his face. For something like this, how, you know, you've had some Ramit Sethi on your podcast, some awesome financial heads that you've surely taken some knowledge for. Where does it sit in terms of a time like this where shit has to just completely stop for a lot of us? And financial buffer. What does it— what does that all mean to you and finances in this time? How much of a focus is that for you?

Matt: Yeah, I— well, I hope it's a, it's a wake-up call for a lot of people to take their personal finances seriously and also not to be reliant on anybody else but themselves. And I think a lot of people bank on Social Security or the government to take care of them, uh, once they retire. And Uh, we need to make sure that we're taking care of ourselves right now because there's always gonna be something that's unexpected that comes up, uh, whether it's your car breaking down, uh, or losing a job or anything like that. Uh, I think that I've personally found myself a little bit more conservative because I've been a freelancer for the past 8 to 10 years, and that's a very uncertain future, or at least the uncertainty is more in your face than a full-time job. Obviously there's so many people today, uh, regardless of their, the field or their career that are now facing real hardships. And, uh, so none of us really ever can be 100% certain in, uh, our job security. We can be certain of our financial savings, of how much runway we have at a time like this. Uh, I personally, it depends on how much risk you're willing to take as well. So I personally, again, being a little bit more conservative financially, I don't want to take a whole lot of risks with finances. So, you know, when I'm— when I made the transition from freelancing to full-time YouTube, I wanted a year of bills and expenses. So making sure I could pay rent for an entire year, make sure I had bills covered just in case I wasn't able to make money for an entire year, which ended up happening.

Tommy: The original doomsday prepper, Matt D'Avella.

Matt: Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, it's funny though, in Los Angeles, people naturally prepare for these kind of things for earthquakes, and everybody's advised to have like an earthquake kit to make sure you have enough water and food to last you a couple weeks. And yeah, like, from like a minimalist perspective too, like, I don't want to just have shelves and shelves filled with shit. I don't want to hoard like crazy. So like, even during this time, and we knew that we were likely going to be at home for 4 weeks or more, we tried to be super intentional with the things that we had. Luckily, we had been, uh, you know, financially, we're— we don't spend extravagantly. We save a lot of our money. Most of my expenses are caught up in my, my business with employees that I pay. But right now, um, in terms of personal assets, we're super conservative.

Josh: What did you buy at the shops? Just today.

Matt: Okay, so today was more of like a snack run, an essential run. But I mean, like, you know, we got peanut butter.

Josh: Where'd you go?

Matt: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we went to TJ's. Uh, you guys don't have TJ's, do you?

Josh: No, we don't.

Mason: No.

Matt: Yeah, so I ended up getting, uh, we got like 2 things of peanut butter. We got a bunch of like fresh fruit and veggies, clementines, uh, or mandarins to last us for a couple weeks, bananas. And then some snacks, some pink and white cookies. Really, really good. Got some ice cream. What are pink and white cookies?

Josh: Are they like a certain— Is that a brand?

Matt: They're like yoghurt frosted cookies. Small.

Josh: Yeah.

Matt: I don't know if they're called pink and white. It's the Trader Joe's brand.

Tommy: And how much marijuana did you pick up? Because that sounds like munchy food right there.

Matt: I can't talk about that publicly, but— I, let's just say I was stocked up before this all started.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, boy.

Matt: I mean, I don't actually— like, it's, it's legal here, guys, but I don't, I don't smoke a lot. But, uh, I did order, like, on— they have, like, these online services. And so, like, 6 months ago, I did order a little bit, and, uh, it's been nice, you know, on the weekend, just relaxing, having some whiskey. By the way, I just want to let people know that currently in Los Angeles it's 6:30, so That's why I'm drinking whiskey.

Tommy: Beer. Beer.

Matt: Yeah, I am.

Josh: Rory asks in the comments, just tuned in, what's with the smoke? Rory, you'll have to watch back to understand what's going on.

Matt: My house is burning down.

Tommy: Or if you've just listened, he's just like lit a spliff. He's pulling an Elon Musk.

Matt: Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. It's a better explanation.

Josh: Your wedding, obviously things changed with that. When did you realise that Shit was—

Matt: Thanks for bringing that up.

Josh: It's a bit of a fun one. Yeah, no, so what was the process in accepting the fact that the wedding in Italy wasn't going to happen?

Matt: Yeah, it was when Natalie told me she didn't love me anymore. And so, it's from that moment I was like, this probably— I might be able to pull it off. It's like my hair, it was shit from the start, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It just highlighted the inadequacies that were already there. Uh, and so, uh, no, it— so I think actually, like, compared to most people, at least in the States, I think Nat and I were so tuned in because, uh, you know, it hit Italy. One of the first places that it hit outside of China was Italy, and it, you know, quickly got out of hand. And so we're just paying attention and trying to make sure we're making the best decision, starting to hear a little bit from our wedding guests saying, hey, you know, what's going on with the wedding? Are you guys still planning on going through with it? And then we were giving that— we basically created a wedding newsletter that we would send out every week. It started to be every couple days, so we sent out about 3 or 4 emails and escalated them or anything.

Josh: Did you just set it all up so you could really mail to Mailchimp, do a bit of different groups?

Matt: We've segmented it down a little bit, so people who are interested in the wedding, people who want to know just about the happy hour, um, but No, it worked out pretty well. Um, well, no, it's, it's, it was one of those things where we were gonna wait until like April, until right around now, just to make a decision, because that's when at the time the, the, uh, I guess the stay-at-home orders for Italy were going to be lifted. And then the more we looked at it, the more we realised that this wasn't just an Italy problem, this was a world problem. And then when the travel restrictions started getting in place for international travel, going to Europe. It was one of those things where the decision really was made for us. And I think in the beginning I was a little bit upset. I mean, before all this was happening, I was upset because it's— you spend so much time and energy planning these things and looking forward to it, and you have this idea in your mind. And Nat are like, well, we're gonna get married this year, and then when we come back from the wedding, we'll get a dog. And then, you know, talking about kids in the future. And then you're like, okay, now everything's just getting pushed back because Nat's said she's definitely not going to be pregnant at the wedding. She's like, it's not one of those weddings. Uh, and then, but then you're upset about it for a little bit, and then the NBA gets postponed, and you're like, it's not really a big deal, is it?

Tommy: Yeah, yeah. Um, breaking— I mean, so forming like the new normal for people has been really challenging, but once I think people get in this groove of the new norm, I think it's going to be really hard to go back the other way. I was thinking about you, Josh. Like, the time that we need you out doing a shoot, I don't know if you're going to want to leave the house. I think you're getting really comfy, and I think a lot of people are probably going to get really sort of comfy in this, you know, staying inside. What do you think about for the— when we're needing to then readjust back to another norm? How's it been for you in this adjustment period?

Matt: Yeah, Tommy, I heard you talking about that on a podcast recently how you were just saying how you like working from home and how you can get to work even quicker and it helps you to spend time with your family and kind of the back and forth. And I was reminded when I started working from home the same thing, that I actually really do value working from home and it allows me to quicker access to the kitchen to eat healthier foods and I can get to work a lot quicker. Uh, I can do things like when it comes to video editing, I can compress a video overnight when like you have an office, it's kind of a pain in the butt to even set all that up and make sure you're doing that. Like, you can transfer files overnight and not worry about, like, you know, I don't have to stay at the office until 7 o'clock. Sometimes there's like a lot of lag time in between doing these processes for video editing. So that's been nice. I think, yeah, I think it's going to be an adjustment for sure. I mean, even when we went out today, it's like going outside, going out into public just feels weird. And it felt wrong. It was like, you know, you almost become a hermit. Just by the circumstances. Like, it's like when you— there's, I think, some like, uh, behavioural study done where if you display a certain emotion, then you'll start to feel that emotion. If like you express pure joy with how you react with your face, then you'll start to feel joy. And now I started to feel like a hermit, and I'm like, I don't want to go outside, I don't want to do anything. And I think it's going to be a real adjustment. But you know, from everything I've seen, it seems like right now is the hardest restrictions And then it'll ease up, and then we'll see if we have to come back to them again. Um, but like, I don't think it's just going to be like, open door, let's go, okay, back to normal. I think it's going to take a while before we get to that point.

Josh: Are you finding it hard to switch off? Like, because you can work as much as you want, or you can do those evenings, how are you separating things?

Matt: I think I've done surprisingly well. Again, video games has actually been like a helpful buffer. Is that PS4?

Josh: What are you, what are you rocking?

Matt: Yeah, so we're playing Warzone, which is Call of Duty, which is, uh, basically like a huge map where you have about 50 teams playing, 150 people, uh, teams of 3. So my, my, me and my 2 brothers, we've been playing almost every night at 6:30 actually, which is right now. So I actually gotta go.

Josh: Oh shit, maybe we could just bring that in and then you could do— could you start a Twitch channel? I mean, you're already TikToking. I feel like you are transitioning to the, the modern day creator, content creator.

Matt: I had a hard enough time setting up this shitty video that I've got for you guys right now that I don't know if I'm capable. I don't know, for like, I'm good at a few things, right? Like, I, I, like, I think I'm pretty good at filmmaking, but for whatever reason, like, doing like live video chatting, I'm just terrible at.

Tommy: Uh, how have you had to rethink ambition within your business, within your YouTube, personal life?

Matt: Well, a week from, uh, I guess a week ago from today, I hired another employee, a second editor and filmmaker, Tyga. Shout out to Tyga. Um, he's a great kid, great editor, like really passionate filmmaker. And, uh, he was gonna primarily be doing a lot of in-person stuff, a lot of photography and filmmaking and doing behind-the-scenes footage for Patreon. And then obviously this whole thing happened and now we're just kind of adapting and trying to figure out how to work remotely, how to make sure, uh, I mean, I'm the one that's like shooting and, um, writing and taking all the photos and video, all this original content for them to edit. So we had to like just restructure and set up systems to be able to, for me to like pass the footage along to them. So like just leaving hard drives outside of my apartment and having them come by and pick it up. Things like that have helped. And then I think in terms of staying focused, and I think I've always naturally had an ambition towards what I do. So the fact that I'm just really passionate about what I do naturally motivates me. And like, I haven't found a decrease in ambition. I think that just, it's been more so like the team collaboration, figuring out how to do that has been the biggest learning curve. Learning lesson over the past couple of weeks.

Josh: Has there been a big perspective shift, like what you were planning to do in January and like you— I know that you had big, big plans in regards to education and all that sort of stuff. Are those plans staying the same or have you shifted?

Matt: Shifted a little bit, but courses are still, I think, going to be a big part of this year. I think by the end of the year, I want to develop 3 courses. The one thing that I've actually been working on over the past couple weeks, I shifted. I have been working on a habits course, but I wasn't feeling as inspired to write it over the past 2 weeks. So especially with like being locked down and everything and even making content around that already, it felt a little bit draining. So I started to develop more like YouTube creative, like talking about creativity and YouTube and how to get started on YouTube. And so I think that's going to probably be the first course that we even come out with, just because I've, uh, it's just like a muscle and a topic that I haven't covered in such a long time. And it's something that was like just so effortless for me to write about and talk about because I've been living it for the past 3 years. So I'm hoping, uh, that like that hasn't changed. And I think if anything in the long run, this will probably make me more productive being at home. Uh, but like I said earlier, there are its own— there are challenges inherent to working from home. And now, like, my team's all at remote, so it's much more difficult to collaborate, uh, on the projects we're working on.

Tommy: We've been talking a bit about just feel— like, the how you feel about a piece of content that you've created. And as a creator, there's so much emotion involved. It doesn't always have to be, but I think a lot of creatives sort of lean into that and they feel great about it or they're feeling negative about it. For you and the content you've been putting out, specific time to now and the sort of stage you're at, how do you feel about the stuff you're putting out into the world?

Matt: I feel pretty good, pretty good. I think I usually look back like a year ago and like, oh, like that thing sucked. Like especially 2 years ago, like I can't believe I made that video or And like now that I'm working on a course about YouTube, I've been revisiting a lot of the early stuff I made for YouTube and just, it's kind of shocking, like how different your approach becomes creatively. Even though that thing that you originally did worked in some form or another. And I think that was like the biggest learning lesson for me early on was just experimentation, trying different things and like not getting locked into the same exact thing over and over again and just trying different approaches. I think that's what helped me the most and probably the one thing that's underestimated. Because like, yes, everybody needs to work hard. Yes, you need to be persistent over a long period of time, but then experimenting and trying different things has been, I think, the root of, uh, what's helped me the most. And also that's what helped me to enjoy and look more fondly at the stuff that I've recently made. I think over the past couple weeks I've had to adapt. I actually had 3 videos shot and edited that were done and ready to go up on YouTube, and they just didn't seem relevant. And I felt like it would be weird, especially considering how rapidly things are moving and how much we learn every day. That if I wasn't to talk about this or provide some kind of support for my audience, talk about, um, you know, how to get through uncertainty and uncertain times, then I'd be doing them a disservice. So I decided to pause them and then just address these things.

Josh: And so the Patreon secret handshake video, is that no longer going out?

Matt: Uh, the secret— the secret handshake video? Do you mean to see your podcast? No, no, dude, it was a Corona— that's very funny!

Josh: That was a funny joke.

Tommy: Now I got you just because I was about to say exactly—

Matt: well, I didn't get it.

Josh: Maybe Patreon someone doesn't get a joke.

Tommy: Do I just keep going on bit by bit? A glass of whiskey.

Matt: You did explain the joke for me because I'm here.

Josh: It was very funny. It's because, because it's not relevant anymore. Yeah, we're not handshaking any more. Are you still handshaking people?

Matt: Well, I see why you confused me because I have a secret podcast and yeah, that's why I made it too late.

Josh: I was trying to be confused.

Matt: It was a very smart joke, but just too smart.

Tommy: Um, the internal critic, uh, for yourself, I guess that's what I was kind of getting at, like what you think about something versus what your audience think about something. What is the dance for you when you're experiencing the internal critic? Negative or positive? How much weight do you give that internal critic?

Matt: It's always there. I like to think about what my audience would say and like, what might the top comment look like if, like, say if a video did poorly or I just like botched something, like what would cause there to be negative feedback or somebody being like, that's wrong, blah, blah, blah. And then, you know, a lot of people might say don't look at feedback, don't pay attention to haters or whatever, but I think like you should be listening to people. And if people are saying that maybe you're doing something, um, that isn't helpful, isn't valuable, then it's worth addressing. And so I think it also helps me to make better videos because I'm able to kind of— I'm trying to provide value and, you know, help people in some way or another. And if they get caught up on one thing that I said without me clarifying it, uh, it may not help them in the end. So I try to maybe like get at the critics as well, or like at least like the critical voice that we all have in our own head. Um, because I don't think it's just like— I'm not trying to please people who are just going to be haters and trolls, Uh, but I'm trying to make sure that, uh, I'm kind of keeping in mind my audience and how they're going to interpret something and kind of like clarifying things that need to be made clear.

Josh: Uh, any YouTubers that you're enjoying watching at the moment?

Matt: Um, I have, I've always like, uh, liked, uh, the filmmaking YouTubers. Matty H is a really good kid. He does a lot of great videos and he's been doing some vlogs lately. I've been watching Sarah Dietschy. She's been, um, because she lives in New York and actually, like, I mean, I lived in New York just a few years ago and so we kind of think about like what our situation would be like now being if we still lived in Brooklyn or if it happened back then. And, um, it just seems really difficult. And so she kind of was talking through her experience, things that were going on during that time. Jordan Syatt, he's a fitness YouTuber and Instagram, uh, fitness coach. And so I've been kind of, kind of just following those people that are relevant and pop up. But I've still been consuming like news and stuff, and just not as much as I originally was. And, uh, you know, because it is, it is comforting in some way to at least be informed, uh, every once in a while.

Tommy: I never knew so many people did exercise until something like this happens, and then everybody online— I mean, Josh and I were skipping on a live stream and you Dancing yesterday, and amazing. Surprised that people were even watching it. I think, um, like 2 weeks ago, I think some of the people who were slightly off within their content was people talking about the opportunity, opportunity, opportunity, opportunity. As much as I like to lock in opportunities, I think it's like it was just a little early when you're trying to— it's not even, it's not even someone trying to see the silver lining in a shit situation. It's like where can I capitalise for my business? Where have you— where is opportunity sat within your mindset at the moment?

Matt: You know, I— yeah, I totally hear you. I saw like a post early on from somebody that was saying there's a big difference between selling now and profiting off of these times. And like, it's like the people that are hoarding N95 masks and selling them at a crazy high markup. And like, there's a fine line between the two because there are people online who need to sell because they have small businesses, employees they need to support. A lot of people have to lay people off now. So I don't, I don't see anything wrong with selling right now. I, you know, I'd be lying if I didn't say that I would feel weird to promote Patreon at a time like this. Even though I've mentioned it, I think 5 times since we started talking. But, um, like I'm not going to mention it in my videos and I'm not going to, hey guys, if you could go support, like just obviously, like I think for this month I'm like, I'll be fine. I don't need to promote it. Uh, and so everybody has their own line and it really depends on your bottom line and whether it means the difference of letting an employee go or not. And if it means that you're going to let an employee go, I think, yeah, like sell your shit. Sell your products, make sure that you, you keep, um, your business going because not everybody can do that right now. But profiting off of it is another thing. And it's like, dude, we get these emails like every day now. It's like, uh, we are committed to helping you through this coronavirus pandemic. By the way, if you want $15, uh, $150 lease on a brand new Ford, Toyota— and it's like, this is so annoying. Like, can we not do this at this time? Like, everybody's trying to like say that they're there for us, and I'm like, I don't need a brand to be there for me right now.

Josh: Um, what have you learned, uh, about your relationship with Nat being sort of at home all the time together, bro?

Matt: Oh, first 2 weeks were tough. Like, they were actually like legit— like legitimately, like, we fought so much. We fought every day for a week straight to the point where like, like, just woke up exhausted just being like, can we just not fight for one day? And I think it's because we—

Tommy: That's a ceasefire.

Josh: It does become a bit of a truce, doesn't it? Yeah.

Matt: I raised up a white flag. I was like, I surrender.

Tommy: You just get a cup of tea with the opponent.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: Yeah.

Matt: We played soccer in the middle of our apartment and it was like, it was good to, to kind of— I mean, I think that the biggest thing that's helped our relationship is communication. So even when we were at a point like this where we were just fighting every day, We were open with each other about how, uh, we were feeling. And when we would bot— like, you know, when you're working right next to somebody, you might bug them and talk to them when they're in the middle of something important and kind of catch them off their flow. And that's not the best way to build a relationship when you're working from home with somebody else. And so we're just honest with each other about how we feel and what we're going through. And I think for us, it was an adjustment period and it was one, a period of like intense anxiety and stress and uncertainty. And so we were both doing our best, but still that led us to be, uh, to kind of, uh, act out towards each other in ways that we normally wouldn't. And then it was kind of the— we found something very similar actually when we first started living together back in Brooklyn, and it was just an adjustment period. It was figuring out how to give each other space because In the past, when we were around each other, we could just hang out with each other all the time when we were dating early on. But then once we were living with each other, we realized, oh, we need to actually make sure we give each other space and we, we are not always next to that person. And like, when they walk through the door, we don't jump on top of them because they haven't seen a human in 3 days. And that was me. But it was, for the most part, um, I think now we've adjusted and now we're doing, uh, much, much better. And we've, uh, we've gotten the hang of it, dude.

Tommy: I, I I'd forgotten about that period of time when I first moved in with Amy, where it is you just can be on each other's nerves or just being that close to somebody all the time is really interesting. What's something that you do, Matt, that annoys Nat? What's—

Matt: What do I do that annoys Natalie? I mean—

Josh: Shooting with the door open. That was one of the ones you actually mentioned last time.

Matt: I don't do that. Yeah. Yeah. I want to say that I—

Tommy: Definitely.

Matt: Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah, that TikTok. I did a TikTok. That was actually Natalie's idea from start to finish. She's been trying to get me on TikTok for a long time, and that idea was so good that I was like, I just can't— I can't not do that. So yeah, there was a— definitely took like 3 or 4 takes to get that. But the TikTok, if you guys want to follow me on TikTok, it's @MatthewDiBella, and there's a video of me on the toilet, but you'll have to go cheque it out to see what it's about. What do I do that annoys Nat? Um, dude, uh, she is surprisingly patient with me. Like, it's like, it's funny because like I thought the other day that she was mad at me because she like, when I was playing video games, she like just like, she walked up and grabbed her computer and it just looked like she had a face that was like I was doing something wrong. And I was like, oh my God, oh my God, what did I do? And then I asked her afterwards, she's like, oh no, like I was just probably thinking about something else. And I was like, it just She's surprisingly cool when I just play hours and hours of video games and I just do my own thing. And I think we respect each other's time. She gets most, I think, pissed at me when I interrupt her when she's in the middle of something, like when she's working. Um, yeah, other than that, I think she's, she's pretty damn patient. I don't know, you're sure there's a lot of other things.

Tommy: You're a little angel, Matt. That's what you are.

Matt: She said she's, she's sitting right next to me, so No, I would tell her to come over here.

Josh: Yeah, the snacks, like how aligned are you with snacks? And Bree and I, the food thing has been a big issue because it's like we can enable each other. Are we going to be— so now we've just, we've dialled in our food to like 6 days be healthy and then just be lenient on 1 day because we were just blowing out every day. How aligned are you with your snacks?

Matt: We are completely on opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of snacks, which is amazing for us. Uh, Nat's savory, I'm sweet. So, uh, that's our personality types as well. So like chocolate, ice cream, donuts. We actually like— we, uh, we did a little bit of a bad thing where we ordered a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts the other night. Yeah, so good. And I ate 9 of those doughnuts in like 2 days. And, uh, like, that was easy. I could have easily went through like the full dozen. But, um, you know, then we also got Thai food a couple nights ago, and Nat was the one that just devoured all of those leftovers, and it didn't affect me too much. So, uh, I definitely am more under the sweet end of things. And like, it definitely helps us because then we don't have to really like compete over who has the food. We don't have to hide food from each other and hide snacks from each other. So, you know, I think that that's probably my favourite thing about our relationship.

Tommy: Have you been for a drive? Are you allowed to drive on the streets of LA at the moment?

Matt: Yeah, you know, they're kind of vague with those kinds of instructions. They don't say like that you can't drive around. I don't think that there's anything wrong with just taking a drive because you're obviously isolated by yourself in your car. You know, when this first started happening, I would say probably about 2 weeks ago or so, Uh, hiking and beaches were still open. And so we went for a hike one weekend and it was just packed. And like, this is— nobody was wearing masks at the time. We weren't wearing masks, but again, nobody was social distancing and it just made it more stressful and it made you more anxious than if you were to just stay at home. And it just defeated the purpose of us going out. Um, but I do remember like during that time, even though the hike itself was stressful, the drive there was pleasant. And I think that that's something that, you know, we're not going to do it every day. We're not just going to drive around randomly, but every few days just to get out, even just for a drive, I think is nice just to get different scenery and not feel like you're cooped up.

Josh: You like rules. How are rules at the moment for you?

Matt: So, I have been doing the 2-day rule, which is— I made a video on it a while back that people seem to resonate with, but it's this idea Uh, and it's, it's, it's one of the, the, the habits slash, um, rules that I've implemented in my life that has had the biggest impact, uh, specifically on my gym habit. So basically I don't allow myself to skip the gym for 2 days in a row because it's just like, it's so much easier when you skip 2 days in a row to skip a 3rd day, a 4th day, a 5th day. Um, you wanna reduce the amount of time in between these habits. And I find that I'm really— I have a really bad memory, but I can always remember, did I work out yesterday? No, I didn't. Great. That means I work out today. And so the 2-day rule has been vital for me at this time, living at home, working from home. As I've started to adapt a new workout routine that works for me, the 2-day rule has really helped me. So like today I didn't work out, but I have for the past 3 or 4 days straight. The 2-day rule allows me to take off multiple days a week. Um, but sometimes, uh, it's, it's, you know, it's, it's nice not to be too hard on yourself, especially from home, because I find myself less inspired. Uh, it's easier for me to get up, hit— like when you're going to the gym, all you have to do is get in the car and then you're like, okay, great. I'm going to the gym.

Josh: If I'd known that, I would have actually—

Matt: yep, that's it. You get in the car, you get out. It's called one rep.

Tommy: Carve, carve, carve pushes. Yeah. Yeah. It's, um, have you actually, do you think you mentioned about the sort of not being so hard on yourself? Josh has mentioned to me a bunch of times around sort of some of the rules I've had, which I've also thought, you know, not, not to be as brutal, which I find that some of these, in order to find the success with the routine, I almost have to have this constant thought, which is a bit brutal on myself, which I do see as— I don't know, maybe there is some fine line of leniency towards yourself. What have you found for implementing other rules in your life, and have they stuck like the 2-day rule?

Matt: Yeah, you know, it's funny because like I hesitate not to say don't be so hard on yourself, even though like I, like Because I'm hard on myself all the time and it works, I guess, a little bit, you know. Like, there's a part of it that works. I think that when you're hard on yourself for too often, for too long, uh, then it becomes drudgery and you become— you resent yourself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, I'm not— I don't need to be a Navy SEAL, you know. I'm pretty determined, you know. I'm pretty ambitious, but I'm not Jocko, and that's fine. And so I think it's a push-pull. It's, um, being hard on yourself when you need to, when you're like, dude, just get, get off your ass, like get to the gym, get a workout in. But then at the same time realizing, you know, like I had 2 weeks when this whole thing started where I didn't work out once and I was fine because I've been through it enough times. I think when you've done it enough times and when you've built and broken habits and knowing that you'll always get back to it, knowing that you won't let yourself fall into a negative spiral, I think is, is key. So like I have that, that kind of background where I know I'm going to be okay, but it's definitely push-pull. So, you know, I think if somebody right now, you know, maybe you do need to be hard on yourself, maybe you don't. It really depends on your circumstance and what you're going through right now.

Josh: With last year, you talked a lot about the anxiety and the panic attacks that you were having. What did you learn from that moment that you're implementing now?

Matt: Alcohol helps a lot. You should just cut that as a social clip right there. It's going to be the promo for our Friday virtual drinks that we do. Oh, I got to come to that. How does that work? How can I join that?

Josh: So, you become a VIP Gronk at thedailytalkshow.com/gronks. You fill out your details and then Mr. 97 will send you an email on the day with a Zoom link. And we're doing kick-ons now as well. And so I'm DJing. Yeah, so I'm DJing for sort of 2 hours after the show.

Tommy: It's actually perfect, Matt, 'cause it's about 10:30 or 10 PM or 11 PM your time. So it's perfect for you to launch at that moment. Is it?

Matt: Is it? Wait, when you do drinks, what time is it?

Tommy: 4 PM in Australian Eastern Standard Time.

Matt: Oh, so, oh, okay. So you said that's like 10 or 11 for me? I don't think so.

Mason: It's 11 o'clock.

Matt: Yeah.

Mason: Is it?

Tommy: Oh, really?

Mason: 11 PM.

Matt: 11 o'clock.

Josh: Isn't that weird to think? No. Is that right?

Tommy: Yeah.

Matt: Right now it's 7 o'clock for me.

Josh: So, it's 7 PM now.

Tommy: Yeah, because we do 2 shows a day and this is our first and then we do the second.

Josh: And then we do the other one. But then how does that get to the the evening again for him.

Tommy: It's this— it hasn't changed, it just gets to the afternoon for us. It's in the same night.

Josh: 3 hours. No, we need to work on that. That's not right.

Matt: It's an evening. What do you mean?

Josh: What, so you're saying that what time— 7 PM our time is 11 PM his time, or what? 4 PM?

Tommy: No, no, no, no, no, no. 4 PM our time is 11 PM Los Angeles time.

Josh: Okay, sure. Okay, that sort of makes more sense. The thing is though that you'll be up late because the kick-ons won't start until after 5. So, you're looking at sort of an after midnight sort of arrangement if you can do that.

Matt: Yeah, I don't know if I'm going to make it to the DJ set, but— Which is kind of disappointing. Is it like a dance party?

Josh: Yes.

Matt: Oh, it's absolutely— There was—

Tommy: Josh was shaving his neckbeard during the—

Josh: Live shave. How many DJs are doing live shaves?

Matt: Not many. I haven't seen it yet. It might actually have an impact, but as like the hair falls down onto the table, it's pretty impressive.

Tommy: If anything, Diavella, your hair is more dialled in than all of us. How's your hair? What's going on?

Matt: I don't know, dude. No, honestly, woke up like this. I'm not even joking. No, it's getting long. I mean, honestly, like, you know, it's kind of growing out over my ears. And so, I've been doing a little bit of touching up. You know, one thing that I've been touching up where I'll take like a, you know, my razor, which is just to kind of clean up my unibrow. And I literally, as like a hairy Italian, I get hair growing out of my nose. It's crazy. It's like gross. Yeah, it's really long. It's— and then like up here. So I'll clean all that up. So I have a razor for that. And but then I'll also use it to just lightly brush my hair and it kind of thins it out a little bit. So because my hair gets really bushy and it's thick. So that's one way that I keep it nice and thin. I just ordered a trimmer, a new trimmer, because my old beard trimmer is just complete garbage and it's super dull. So I'm planning on cutting my own hair coming up, and I don't know how it's going to go, but, you know, I've got no other options. Like, the thing is, like, I think there's less pressure for people who don't have to be on camera every week in a video. And you guys look better in hats than me, so I just, I just have to cut my hair.

Tommy: Uh, while we're talking hair chat, uh, what would you rather, uh, pubes as fingers or fingers as pubes?

Matt: That doesn't make any sense. Like, how, like, how could you mean like your hand is just a bush of pubes?

Tommy: Yeah, your pubes currently would just be fingers and then your fingers would be almost a paintbrush.

Matt: Yeah, uh, one thing I just want to clarify, I'm well groomed, so I actually don't— I don't have any pubes. Uh, right, yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's what I just wanted you to get that image in your head.

Josh: How often are you having to trim to sort of keep that, that level of— like, absolutely zero? Have you got like a, um, what's it called, like a, uh, it's not a zero It's a zero?

Tommy: Yeah.

Matt: Have you got a fade? Yeah, yeah, I do. I do a generous fade on it, so it goes from a zero to a six.

Tommy: Is it true that you have your favourite basketballer's number carved in?

Matt: In my— on my ass? Yes, I do.

Tommy: Oh, there's been a bit of hair chat this week. We've talked about monobrows, your back hair, Josh. Yeah, that's still been happening. What about— there's some challenges, like I saw One that's going around is the handstand t-shirt challenge. I just saw someone on my Instagram do it where you put your feet up on the wall doing a handstand, top off, and then you have to put your t-shirt on. How much pushback are you giving to these things? Like these challenges?

Matt: I think a lot of pushback. I think it should stop, honestly. Like, it's too much. You know what? There's just too much content. Everybody's doing a live stream. You guys were doing it before, so you're fine. No, every— like, literally, you're a part of the problem. You're like, hey, let's just do 2 episodes a day because there's just not enough content out there right now. Um, but like, you go on Instagram now and there's always like 12 lives going on at the same time. Everybody's got a different challenge. Everybody's challenging me to do push-ups. I'm like, guys, just get out of my life. Like, give me a second. It gets, uh, you know— no, but at the same time, at the same time, it's like, cool, yeah. People are making stuff, but it's like people— it's like people just found out the internet was a thing, and then they're like, oh, you can make videos online? And it's like, come on, like, just relax for a second, mate.

Tommy: I only found out this year that the, the internet— there's a cable running from Australia over to somewhere else, and that is the internet that runs through the cable, and sometimes sharks bite it. Did you know?

Matt: I didn't know that part. I knew that there were cables underneath the, like, on the ocean floor, did not know that sharks would bite them. And is that why, like, my internet is so shitty?

Tommy: That's what we will blame it on.

Josh: We will blame it. Yeah, I think halfway through.

Matt: Yeah.

Josh: Um, do you consider yourself, like, when, when you're in the dating scene, were you someone who was a good, like, good at dating?

Matt: Nah, dude, I was really bad, honestly. Like, I, I, like, I think, like, I always I probably like deluded myself into thinking that I was good, and I was the guy that would be like, no, here's what you need to do. Like, I would just give advice all the time even though I was horrible with women and nobody wanted to date me.

Tommy: Just a quick one, would you suggest someone in the dating scene shave their pubes?

Matt: Uh, yes. No, I think so. I think that's the look right now. I don't think that that's gone out of style. I don't know. Yeah, Mr. 97. Yo, I saw that girl that you were talking with the other day. How's that going?

Josh: Gross.

Mason: Yeah, it's going great.

Matt: Yeah? What happened?

Mason: They're still chatting, FaceTiming.

Matt: Oh, wow. That's awesome.

Josh: They chatted for 4 hours last night.

Matt: What? Are you serious? Yeah, I mean, it's happened a few times. Where does she live?

Mason: Perth.

Matt: Oh, that's a bummer.

Josh: That's a bit far away.

Tommy: Yeah.

Matt: That's a bit of a trek, isn't it? But for now it's fine because she doesn't have any other options.

Josh: It is a real blessing, to be honest. Hey, I put together a bunch of questions that to help with stimulus, because I just— the concern I have is that 97's not always that great at coming up with content. Like, once he's got the— we give him the idea. Very good at running with it and reacting. And so my concern was when I sort of spoke to him casually about his chats with Grace, he did— he couldn't really mention like what the questions were he was asking. He didn't really have much content. He said, oh, she was talking a lot and I was listening. So what I did was I created—

Matt: That's a good step though, I want to say. I feel like He's probably more wise than us.

Josh: Absolutely not. No, no, no. The advice master is about to come out. So, so some of the questions that I came up with for, for Sev's to ask. If you had to live anywhere outside of Australia, where would you live? What's your favourite animal and why? Beach or pool? Pub or club? Do you sleep when travelling on a plane? Where's the furthest you've ever driven? Do you get motion sick? If so, when was it the worst? Hotel or Airbnb? City or country life? If you had to pick a meal for me to eat at your favourite restaurant, what would you pick? When was your last boyfriend? Which was quite controversial on Instagram. People think that you can't ask about dating history, but we'll continue. If you could be a pro athlete, what sport would you pick? If you had to pick a different career, what would you pick? Winter or summer fashion? You can only have one app on your phone, which one do you pick? Call or text? Big group catch-up or one-on-one? Do you want to have kids? If so, how many? Last meal on death row? Night in or night out? Stay up late or wake up early? And red wine or white wine? They were the questions that I gave. Do you want to throw some questions into the mix?

Matt: I just know, I just kind of visualise in my head, I imagine Mr. 97 asking all those questions back to back without a breath of air in between. This is what I'm supposed to do? I just ask these questions? Oh man, I don't know if I'm very good at coming up with questions off the top of my head.

Josh: That's—

Matt: those all were really solid. What, like, how did— what inspired you to—

Josh: huh? No, well, you know, I've just— I don't know my muse, but it just happens. Um, but Sibs, did you ask any of the questions?

Mason: Asked all of them. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, we ran through them all.

Tommy: It's so good.

Matt: I want to say that the boyfriend one isn't bad, by the way.

Mason: That was actually probably my favorite, I reckon.

Matt: And why?

Tommy: Why?

Matt: No, I just—

Mason: no, it's because you get to go into talking about everything else, so I just thought it was an interesting segue into everything.

Matt: I think it's how you approach that question. If you approach it with confidence, not with like jealousy or neediness, then you're, you're just genuinely curious. And I think it also depends on like how long— I mean, it depends on how you pull it off, but like generally speaking, you might not want to bring that up the first time you talk to somebody. But then if it's a few hours into like chatting with them, um, it could bring up some interesting things. It could bring up some baggage that somebody doesn't want to talk about, but that's up to them.

Tommy: I remember you telling a storey about where you'd been out of the dating game, Matt, for a while, and you were anxious and you were in the shower stressing about going on this date, and then you went on it and it was nothing like you thought it was going to be. How much— like, for Sev's— the, the stress of it all and the thought of it all being way worse than the reality of the whole thing?

Matt: Yeah, I think that it's— you have to go through it And you have to push yourself through those uncomfortable situations until it becomes natural and it's not as painful. And so the first date I went on in 5 years after just, you know, avoiding it, like, dude, I was going to say the plague. You can't say that. Oh man, I stopped myself, but I had nothing. I had no other word to insert into that.

Tommy: Very true.

Matt: So yeah, so I was, I just was avoiding dating like crazy. And then eventually, I finally went on a date, you know, for 5 years. And what happened, I went on the date, we went out for coffee, and I didn't have a connection with that person. And as nervous as I was leading up to it, as stressful as it was for that, you know, the day or two leading up to the date, when I finally went on the date, I just like had this just complete relief. And, and I was so content and proud of myself for overcoming something like that. Again, I was horrible at dating, but it allowed me to get over that. That was definitely like, I think the worst anxiety that I faced was just that first one. And then the more and more I did it, the less and less I felt anxious. I still got nervous before every single date, I started to kind of keep more of an open mind where I thought in my head like, okay, I'm going out and I'm just trying to meet new people. I'm not trying to find the love of my life. I'm just trying to meet people, maybe make some friends, maybe a relationship. We'll see. I'm open to it, but who knows. And then, you know, so I would go on multiple dates a week sometimes, sometimes 2 or 3 dates a week. Um, just because I was— I found that I would sometimes spin my wheels and talking with people online, messaging through these, uh, you know, dating apps, not feeling like there was a connection there, but not ever knowing until I meet them in person. Because when you meet them in person, it's a different ballgame and people can like have great chat through text. But then when you meet up with them in person, you're like, oh yeah, this actually isn't working out at all because they have a really big forehead.

Tommy: I just thought, Seb, do you actually think that you've got no chat or bad banter? Personally, do you think that?

Mason: On text message? Absolutely. But as soon as like it's in FaceTime and in person, then it's, then it's great.

Josh: FaceTime, I feel like, is the new in person, let's be honest.

Matt: So what's wrong with the, the text chat? Why don't you have good banter with texting?

Mason: Uh, I mean, it's, I guess it's just, uh, it's a hard thing, I guess, when you're like, you're teasing someone because you don't get the full context of it all. So definitely a real asshole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, come across real full-on. When you're in person or FaceTiming or whatever, you can understand the sarcasm.

Matt: You know what's a good tip? Yeah. And like on that note, it's like, yeah, it's something that you— because you— it's tough because you have to be like confident and you have to be able to like let something sit even if it's awkward without saying JK, JK, LOL, I'm sorry. But I think one helpful tip with dating for me has been like try not to answer every question straightforward. Like answer it with a joke. So like, you know, it's like, how old are you? Like, you could— you like, 16, or like, my 16th birthday is tomorrow. Or I don't know, like every time try to crack a joke, or try to like— don't answer it straightforward, because then that's when the conversation gets kind of boring and stale, where it's just like Q&A back and forth, where you want to add like a little bit of lightness and humor. Even if it's not funny in the sense of like dating, it might actually work.

Josh: How did you know, um, with Nat that things were getting serious? What are some of the signs, uh, when it was getting serious?

Matt: Um, I, you know, I, I liked her right off the bat, and we had like a really great connection right away. Um, I think the one thing that drew me to Nat was that she just was like a shit talker. She had great banter. She would make fun of me and I would make fun of her and just the flirting.

Tommy: Are you talking about our relationship? Is this like the Daily Talk Show and Matthew Vella's relationship?

Matt: Yes, it was. It was— I mean, it was— I don't want to say love at first sight, but lust at first sight was definitely—

Tommy: yeah, yeah, definitely. And the Aussie thing. That's why—

Matt: yeah, the Aussie thing. Yeah, the accent. Actually, it's funny because Nat told me She was, uh, cause you know, like being in New York, being Australian, uh, there's not a whole lot of them there and it's kind of a unique selling point. Hey, like I have a unique accent. And then, uh, but my whole thing was, and this is like another dating tip. Again, I'm a guru of dating. Um, but like, try not to like say the obvious. So like if you're dating somebody and she's American and she has an American accent, most people are going to call that out in the first date. But if you don't call that out, if you kind of are— I don't know, you just don't want to be obvious. You want to be original with the conversation that you're having. And so don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do the obvious, basically. The other one is don't mention— I personally think you shouldn't mention a girl's looks on the first date. I think that if you're like saying, oh yeah, you look really beautiful tonight, like it shouldn't be about her looks on the first date, uh, the first time that you meet them, it should just be about their brain and just keep all those other thoughts inside your head.

Tommy: What's your vibes on negging?

Matt: Neg hard. No, don't. You know, negging— Yeah, you, you, you honestly, your breath smells horrible. Um, I think negging— so I actually— okay, so I've read The Game and I've like read dating books and obviously because I wasn't very good, so I was like, I need professional help. And, um, so when it, when it comes to negging, uh, in the context of game theory and dating theory or whatever, it's generally only reserved for women who are like supermodels who get hit on 100 times a day and are just so annoyed with guys hitting on them that you neg them in a way of saying like, "Hey, you want a piece of gum?" kind of inferring that they have bad breath because there are—

Josh: I didn't take that, to be honest. I would have just—

Matt: Yeah, I know. I feel like I don't hear these.

Josh: It's a subtle joke.

Matt: That's 'cause we're not hot women. And hot women— nobody says that to a hot woman. They don't say like, "Hey, would you want a piece of gum?" So like, you do something like that that just throws them off and makes them realize, "Oh, wow, this person doesn't give a shit about—" my looks when everybody else on the planet does. In that context, it makes sense. In the context of like 99% of the population, negging is just mean and it's not going to actually help you.

Tommy: God, I'm not even negging when I say to my wife, have a piece of chewing gum.

Matt: Yeah, I'm just being straight up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's real.

Josh: Uh, Dave Ellis, so some questions. If you were to throw just a few into the mix that 97 could ask Grace.

Matt: Can you give us a few examples? Okay, sorry, just quickly.

Tommy: I think, I think Sev is literally taking The Daily Show that we put out and then using it as like legit banter cards. Like, hey, Grace, did you see what they're saying? You gotta answer these now. Yeah, it's almost too easy. There's no learning in it for him.

Josh: He's learning. Is he? Yeah.

Matt: I don't want to lean into foot fetish, but maybe there's something around feet. Favorite fetish. What is that? Did you say biggest pet peeve?

Mason: No, I haven't done that one.

Josh: I like that. I haven't done that.

Tommy: I like that. Any phobias?

Josh: Yeah, that could be any phobias.

Matt: What's your— what's your greatest fear? Because then also you get them to feel afraid. And then you're the protector. Yeah. It's dating 101, guys.

Tommy: It's actually page 123 from the game.

Matt: Yeah. Um, there's a lot of like the, uh, would you rather, right? Like, would you rather have pubes, uh, as fingers or fingers as pubes?

Josh: Have you asked that one yet, Sebbs?

Matt: No, I haven't asked that one yet. Okay.

Tommy: Yeah, and if she gives you an answer like, uh, Matt Diavella, you know you've gone a little too far.

Matt: Yeah, yeah, you blew it.

Josh: Um, what about, um, yeah, this is good. I'm just enjoying it. You go now. Just improvising. Go. What else? Well, I don't know.

Matt: I feel like, um, this could be boring around the idea of books, but maybe there's something that's— maybe there's something that's, that's fun about book people. I find that like actually, okay, we were doing really good with the improv and then I brought up fucking books. What about—

Tommy: let's think about it's, um, you're speaking to someone who's not in the same state. Could you read them a book? Could you read them a bedtime story?

Josh: Bedtime story.

Matt: Oh, bedtime story. Yeah, you kind of have to think about it as like bits on like a show, right? And like, if you're talking for extended periods of time, what's gonna help you pass the time? I mean, one, I think, uh, just any kind of virtual game, right? Like There's— what's that new app now? Have you guys used the— Houseparty? I have it on my phone here. Yeah, Houseparty. That's a good one. I'm sure that you guys could play some digital games. You know, that's actually— that's another great tip for dating.

Tommy: Playing some digital games.

Matt: Yeah. No, no. But like, I mean, in-person dating, it's easier. But there's a lot of pressure. And if you find yourself to be a little bit more introverted, there's a lot of pressure to going on a coffee or a beer date or just grabbing drinks because there's— it's just all about the conversation. And if you're nervous, you're going to slip up, you're going to screw up, and you're not going to feel as comfortable. So try to find dates where there's some kind of activity that distracts. It gives you conversation to talk about. And so whether it's bowling or throwing darts or anything in between, like I used to go to this like ping pong place in New York all the time. So like we would grab a drink, we would chat a little bit, and it's like, hey, let's go to the table and play ping pong.

Mason: Jesse on the livestream has said, what 3 things would you take to a deserted island? That's a good one.

Josh: What would you answer, Diweller? What's your answer to that?

Matt: As a minimalist, is there electricity on this island? You know, like, okay, let's just say that there is electricity. Alcohol? No, I don't know, dude. That's like a— So, if you had to have 3 things, right, and you're just talking about survival. You'd have to have one of those things to start fire. What is that called? Flint and steel? Yeah, get a flint and— yeah, is that two things? This flint and steel kind of—

Tommy: we can just get the—

Mason: no, I reckon that's one thing.

Matt: I think it's just a flint. Yeah, it's just a fire pack. All right, you definitely want matches as well. No, you want a knife, Josh.

Josh: Okay, you need it.

Matt: You need a knife. Yeah, no, yep.

Tommy: All right, knife. What about it?

Matt: And then, uh, A budgie smuggler.

Tommy: A pair of budgie smugglers, is that what you're meaning? Or a legit budgie? Smuggled. A smuggled budgie. Yeah. So, then you got one item left. If you've smuggled a budgie in, now you've got one more item.

Matt: That's brilliant. I didn't even think about it like that. Okay. What else would you bring? Maybe like a kettle, a pot, a pot. Really? Okay, I guess. I don't know, I haven't watched enough survival YouTube channels.

Josh: If there's electricity and there's like, you can— Jesse says there's one output, one outlet, one working one output. Yeah, that's hard. And you can't— could you bring one thing being an adapter? Do you have more multi-box?

Mason: Yeah, you have to, right?

Matt: Yeah, sure. Well, is there Wi-Fi?

Josh: Yeah, and how good is it? Or is there Ethernet? And can I— does an Ethernet dock— does that come with it?

Tommy: I think it's like—

Matt: well, what we're seeing here is that this is a great question, 'cause it creates a lot of other questions. Mm. Yeah. Um, but no, yeah, like, obviously if you could bring a computer or something to play games with, 'cause, like, you're talking about just passing the time at that point. Mm-hmm. You're just waiting for somebody to save you. What would you guys bring? Uh, what would I bring? Yeah, let's not deflect.

Josh: I'd bring an iPhone.

Matt: It just ran out of battery.

Josh: Yeah, yeah. And a battery. No, well, I've got the one, the one outlet. So, I would say an iPhone, a— The other two are hard. Water purifier.

Tommy: Flint. And if you want a tarp, you'd want a tarp or something, right? That's it.

Matt: No, but like, you don't need a water survival. Here's the thing, you don't need a water in Hawaii, bro.

Tommy: We're not going to Hawaii. This isn't the island we're on. You can boil the water though.

Josh: I've got this, I've got a book. Yeah, I'll show you. Hang on, stand by. I've got— yeah, where are we? I got this, um, the other day. The Wilderness Survival Guide. So I'd probably just look into that.

Tommy: Take that as one of the items.

Josh: Yeah, I could do that because then I can create my own axe. It tells you exactly how to choose a knife, which is handy. There's lots of options. Uh, Diwella, before we go—

Matt: yeah, yeah, no, go ahead. I'm gonna get some steam going while we get into this.

Josh: What are you excited about at the moment? What's What's getting you excited? What are you excited about for the rest of the week?

Matt: Dude, I just finished Succession. Have you guys watched that show? No. No. Really, really good. I definitely recommend it.

Josh: Is it a comedy?

Matt: What's the vibe? Yeah, it actually is a comedy. It's based off of, like, the Fox News empire. And, uh, I forget the— that main gronk that's like the head of that whole— that whole news network. But, um, it's, uh, it's super funny. It's, uh, Will Ferrell and Adam McKay are the guys who produced it and created the show. So it's, it's, it's comedic but serious at the same time, and it's kind of like empire building. Um, it's like, uh, yeah, I, I definitely recommend it if anybody's looking for a good show to watch. Is it on Netflix? Where is it? It's on HBO. Okay. "Wonder how old you are." So, that's what I'm excited about with life right now. Yeah. Keep it simple, stupid. Yeah. No, I'm excited about continuing to find my balance and find out what fulfils me and kind of adjusting to the new normal, like you guys were talking about. Um, I found— Are you laughing about the smoke? That's just going up the room, or—? Uh, just getting high every day, bro. Just excited about good vibes for all. It actually looks like you're, um, about to play laser tag.

Josh: Like, it's got that vibe.

Matt: Yeah, yeah, so laser tag as well. No, you know, I just— let me get that adjusted. Okay, um, beautiful. No, I know, I feel, I feel good. I'm, I'm feeling very content right now, and, and I'm comfortable with the adjustments we've been making. I mean, I think right now, uh, to be totally honest, you know, I, I think that the one thing that I think about the most is just like the safety and health of my family and friends. And even though we know that this thing, like, you know, is only going to seriously impact maybe 1%, 2% of the population, that likely will have impacts throughout. So just trying to, like, enjoy as much time and not take for granted what I have, uh, and, you know, just cherish those moments that I do have with my family and friends because, you know, not to be morbid, but you never know. And regardless of this situation, you do never know. So, um, and it's one of the reasons why it's great to connect with you guys. Thanks, brother.

Tommy: It's, uh, love you, dude. Thank you. No, you're doing all right.

Matt: I want to do this again. Uh, I'm gonna have to get like a webcam or something because I just don't feel confident about the visuals that I'm putting out.

Josh: Next time, just take us to a ping pong game and we can, we can You know, you'll warm you up, confidence.

Tommy: Yeah, look, we would have cut you off if there was no smoke, no steam. We wouldn't have run this episode. The smoke looks great.

Josh: It actually— it's got me thinking about Friday virtual drinks. I think I might need that for the kick-ons.

Matt: Recommend it. I recommend it. It definitely changes the vibe completely.

Josh: You guys are a smoke machine.

Matt: Uh, it's a hazer, and like, you have to get like a certain kind of Haze fluid. I could send you the exact link to the one I got on Amazon.

Josh: Uh, are you trying to push an affiliate link on me?

Matt: Listen, I make a small percentage from every purchase. It's not even that much. No, but you guys have actually— you guys have been killing it. I mean, what you've, uh, how you've been able to quickly adjust and adapt to these circumstances is, is really impressive. And making it easy for people like me to pop on. And even though we had technical difficulties in the beginning, uh, it's been, uh, cool to watch you guys kind of, uh, adjust and adapt to these— the situation. Thanks, mate.

Josh: Thanks, mate. Uh, it's a Daily Talk Show. If you, uh, want to join us for the virtual drinks, you can go to thedailytalkshow.com/gronks to do that. Uh, otherwise, uh, D.Vella's got his own YouTube channel. Which I know you need some more subs. It's pretty good.

Matt: Yeah, just, uh, dude, traction's been slow lately.

Tommy: Have you— what is the traction on YouTube?

Matt: That's good. I mean, I think, you know, it's— no, it's good, it's good, it's good. I think— I think I get like, uh, I haven't— I don't look at the numbers too much. Too, too much. Um, I know— however, uh, no, like, I know when a video is doing bad or it's not bad when it's not doing up to the past 10 or so videos, because like YouTube kind of lets you know like, hey, you screwed up with that last one. Um, but I think I still get on average like 50 to 70K new subscribers a month, which is pretty awesome. That's amazing.

Josh: Awesome. All right, it's a daily talk show. We are streaming 11 AM, 4 PM. What's Australian Eastern Standard Time?

Matt: I just, I just love how that's how we end. I get about 70,000 subscribers a month.

Josh: That's what we got. Do you have something else you want to say? Yeah, what do you want to leave? What do you want to end on?

Matt: I just wanted a little bit of— I just wanted a little bit of buffer in between. Okay, sure. I just want to appear humble.

Tommy: Okay. This is one more piece of dating advice.

Josh: I feel like that would be good.

Matt: Uh, one more from me. Yeah. Um, No means no. That's probably not a good thing to end on. I mean, it's good advice. It's good advice. Yeah, it's very good advice. It's sound. It's very sound. I want a dating— communication is key. Mr. 97, what's one piece of advice that you would give to people that are out there dating? I'm better at asking questions than answering them.

Mason: I think there's probably the— there's probably the thing to do where you're trying to act cool and just sort of, um, not really lean into your emotions and how much you're enjoying it. And so I think communicating that and just being upfront with that and sort of just not trying to be cool about it, just saying how you feel. How does that align with negging?

Tommy: Or Matt's advice around Uh, don't say the obvious.

Josh: Don't answer the question.

Matt: That's technically not what I said. Like, never answer straightforward, always lie.

Tommy: And on that note, this is a lot of fun. Matt D'Avella, thanks for joining us, mate.

Matt: Thanks so much for having me, guys. This is a lot of fun. Let's do it again soon. I know you do a lot of these.

Josh: We do. It's the Daily Talk Show.

Tommy: Have a good one. See you guys.