The Cloacal Kiss

Tommy: The Daily Talk Show.

Josh: It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 489.

Tommy: It's Fat Fridays.

Josh: You, uh, you went off, uh, you were going to do an Uber Eats order, decided it would be quicker just you running out and getting something.

Tommy: Oh mate, it's, um, you know, it's Friday morning we're recording this and it's a hard time. Not all shops are open, not all like restaurants that do the lunchtime service are open, so you're very limited.

Josh: Well, Well, the reason that, yeah, the lunchtime service isn't open is because it's before 9 AM.

Tommy: And I don't want to spend the $7.99 on a delivery fee.

Josh: I wonder how Uber Eats— 97, can you look at how Uber Eats actually structures their delivery pricing? So, for instance, sometimes it can be $2.99. I just spend all my time in the free section. Like, I'll just refresh what's available, refresh what's available, waiting for my favourite stuff.

Tommy: You're living the life, aren't you, mate?

Josh: Yeah. I mean, it's good if you've got, if you've got 2 hours, like if you can have dinner between 5 PM and 7 PM, you could either spend 5 between 5 and 7 cooking your food, or you can spend it refreshing until the thing that you want comes up.

Tommy: It's the old strategy. What if it doesn't come? What if it doesn't come up?

Josh: Oh, you end up, you end up getting a margherita pizza for lunch.

Tommy: Look, let's not sway too far away from the Fat Fridays, but firstly, you guys are getting your blood tests today. Um, I don't know if this is a problem. I've tried to work it out, but what Mr. 97 has, because he got his referral last night, what Mr. 97 has on his is different to what mine said on mine. So I'm trying to work it out between, because we're getting a testosterone test.

Josh: Testosterone. He's got testosterone as well.

Tommy: Well, that's what I asked for. And mine said testosterone free or free testosterone.

Mason: Yeah, I saw this.

Tommy: And so there's two, I think two, what I'm trying to work out is there one testosterone overall testosterone level within the body and then there's another marker which is testosterone free. So it's not lacking of like free, it's like just a medical term, free testosterone.

Josh: I just assume given how much you've been trying to get this free test, I just assume that you meant that they'll free. Oh no, it was.

Tommy: It was free, didn't pay for it.

Josh: Like, mate, can you at least put the— can you actually write that down?

Tommy: Would I worry?

Josh: Testosterone, I know, but just let him know.

Tommy: I need to know that this is going to be free and I want to see it on the paper. So I'm trying to work out, I think what's going to happen is you're, you're the one going to the doctor today and Mr. 97 is getting the blood test and hopefully you can too. We need to ask the pathologist, is the testosterone free the same as the testosterone? Or you need to say, does this test for testosterone free as well? Because then I will have to— then we can run off that marker.

Josh: Sure.

Tommy: It's quite complicated, but I was spending a bit of time worrying about it last night.

Josh: Yeah.

Mason: An update on that Uber surge pricing—

Josh: what's not surge pricing?

Mason: Well, they do during peak hour.

Josh: Okay, okay.

Tommy: That delivery fee.

Mason: Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's, it's based on the distance from the restaurant.

Josh: Sure. So that's what I find, like, I My Uber Eats is within 800 metres normally of my place, I reckon, which is free. It's a free zone, right? It's the free zone.

Mason: Elsie M said to her husband, I love these guys. And he said, are they the ones talking about nothing like a modern-day Seinfeld?

Josh: Modern-day Seinfeld is nice. Yeah.

Tommy: Who's Kramer? You got Kramer vibes because Kramer's always looking dumb and you're not afraid.

Josh: I mean, which one's the perfect one in Seinfeld? Jerry. So you are Jerry. Thanks, bro.

Tommy: Appreciate that you called me Seinfeld.

Mason: Dill Takes Photos says, when are we going to see some snapback caps with Gronkh on the front?

Tommy: Um, I know you love them, I just don't like snapbacks. But yeah, snapbacks, people demand them. If— Dill, I know you wear snapbacks, bro.

Mason: Yeah, I mean, both Dills are in the chat sending each other some love, so that's nice.

Josh: We actually— TJ was literally saying yesterday we need to get Dill Takes Photos on FaceTime at some point soon.

Tommy: Yeah, next week. I mean, what's the time right now in— Where is he? Ireland.

Josh: Scotland? I always get confused between Scotland and Ireland. Isn't that fucking embarrassing?

Tommy: It's Ireland. It's Ireland. He's Irish.

Josh: They're in Northern something something.

Tommy: Yeah, he's from the land of Conor McGregor, which is— Yeah, Ireland. He's Irish.

Mason: Wayne Peters. I really don't understand why people use Uber Eats.

Josh: Well, Wayne, that feels like a personal attack.

Tommy: All right.

Josh: So, I agree. I agree. I think the thing is that it's a— I need to get— I've noticed that as I'm getting older, I'm getting— I'm losing some of my abilities, or I'm— it's getting more and more uncomfortable for me to— like, me going to the doctor and having to deal with all this stuff, high pressure. I feel it. I'm just like, I'm just so stressed about it. I was like, because Bree was like, oh, you should get them to cheque your, um, blood pressure. It's gonna be through the roof, especially because I'm gonna have— I've been given like 40 different things that you want me to say.

Tommy: And then have you booked the appointment?

Josh: No, no, no, no. I'm going to, um, straight after this. I want to go, uh, before midday. I want to go like 11 AM with the— I think—

Tommy: Have you booked it though? No. Can you just— Is it just a walk-in?

Josh: No, I'll just book. I'll just call up if I can.

Mason: Booking just like 10 minutes before you?

Josh: Yeah, no, just call now.

Tommy: Call out now. Uber Eats, you can get it when you want.

Josh: In fact, if I could Uber Eats a GP, I would.

Tommy: Yeah, doctors on call, you can, but it's expensive.

Josh: Imagine if we did that, we could just get a doctor. It's just the whole—

Tommy: come to the office. No, I know.

Josh: So what is the concern with me just being honest, saying you can't—

Tommy: my mates, you do, but if it fucks up, you just have to go to another GP.

Josh: And so you think it will fuck up based on—

Tommy: well, it might, it might not, I don't know.

Josh: But are they— is it illegal for them, for us to be comparing or something? Like, what's the concern?

Tommy: I don't know.

Josh: What do you think the concern is, 97, of me just saying, hey, I'm in a podcast, my mate thinks that he's got more testosterone. Yeah, I'm pretty—

Mason: I think it's— I think that they'll probably just be like, it's a waste of resources. Yeah, if any. Like, that, that'll be their reason, right? Just to wait. Like, what's the point? Like, I was— there was like a 90-year-old bloke sitting next to me yesterday when I was getting mine done.

Josh: In the actual—

Mason: not in the room, no, no, just in the waiting room next to me. And so I was gonna say, that's weird. It was just like, bulk bills, really?

Josh: Yeah, we can't fucking— if it's gonna be bulk bills, you can have the building.

Tommy: No, but I was just like, I wonder what he's he's in here for.

Mason: He's like this old bloke with like shakes and stuff, and he's probably got a fucking podcast.

Tommy: The test, test.

Josh: Um, can we see what the food is?

Tommy: Okay, so, um, I was trying to work out what I would, um, get for today, and I just want you— each time I bring out an item, just say what it is, all right?

Josh: Okay, so you've got a green, uh, bag, like a Woolworths bag.

Tommy: Just read out what that is.

Josh: This is annoying.

Tommy: Read out what that is.

Josh: Pumpkin soup.

Tommy: Okay. Yeah. And read out what this is.

Josh: Yeah. Marshmallow Co. Pink and white marshmallows. No artificial colours or flavors.

Tommy: Okay. And we got this one. What's this one?

Josh: Oh no. I think I know what this is. What's happening. It's a Grand Sir— Just say what it is.

Tommy: What it is. You don't need to say what the brand is.

Josh: It's cheese.

Tommy: But is it?

Josh: I reckon it's milk, salt.

Tommy: It's Parmesan cheese.

Josh: It doesn't say Parmesan on it.

Tommy: And now what's that?

Josh: A party mix, a natural confectionery company, which is Josh's crap.

Tommy: It's Josh's crap. And so there's 4 items here and I want you to tell me what they all have in common.

Josh: Vegetarian.

Tommy: What about that? What is—

Josh: is that a sentence? What about that?

Tommy: Yeah, what about that? What does that mean? What have they all got in common? Elaborate on what you think, why you say that word.

Josh: Uh, I feel like they've all got gelatin in them, which would mean what? They've got animal product but they're vegetarian, so then they're not vegan. Okay, so the lollies— lollies—

Tommy: all of these 4 products, the same thing. The consistent thing is they are not vegetarian. But they say they are. No, they are not vegetarian. Which you might think just from looking at them.

Josh: So gelatin—

Tommy: A can of pumpkin soup would be vegetarian. You might think cheese, I can eat cheese, I'm a vegetarian. Milks and cheese, Parmesan cheese, not vegetarian. Gelatin within marshmallows.

Josh: Why would you do 6 things that I could— 1, 2, 3, what do I have? 4 things I can't eat.

Tommy: Because I thought I want to support my mate, and in this quest for his—

Josh: this is a weird way to support your mate, becoming a vegetarian. You're the equivalent of being like, hey mate, did you enjoy that vegetarian soup? And then saying, I say yes, and you're like, well, there was bacon in it. No, but I'm not gonna make—

Tommy: my point is it's Fat Fridays. I'm not gonna make you eat any of these, but I thought I was trying to work out, you know, my initial thought was I'm gonna go to the supermarket, I'm gonna find like all these cool vegetarian things that you can eat. And there's a couple that are good, like veggie chips, and there's a bunch in the, you know, the aisles of the frozen food and stuff. I was like, we can't really eat that. And then I was like, what are the things that vegetarian people— most people would think are vegetarian?

Josh: So, gelatin, we are, we are not considering these things as vegetarian.

Tommy: No, they're not. If you're a vegetarian, they're not. Gelatin is an animal product. It's an animal product, but the thing is, it comes from the hooves of an animal. So I'll tell you, so I did some interesting— like, I thought this is interesting.

Josh: Yeah, I know, it's interesting education, but you— we've got a Fat Fridays where there's nothing I can fucking eat, so you put me in a position.

Tommy: So I'll just tell you, like, um, this, this vid—

Mason: this, uh, you're gonna break being vegetarian.

Tommy: Yeah, well, I don't want him to. This, this pumpkin soup has chicken stock in it. Which you can't eat. Like, don't you think this is interesting for someone who wants to become a vegetarian?

Josh: Yeah, it's interesting. It's the worst Fat Fridays ever.

Tommy: Yeah, but I thought I'd spice it up a bit.

Josh: I get it, I get it.

Tommy: You don't need— your one was to eat shit food.

Josh: I thought, yeah, when I saw my initial thoughts— oh God, it's coming out the bag, it's broken, I can smell it. Uh, no, but to be honest, I thought what was happening is you'd taken 4 items that were vegetarian and you're going to play some form of game where we had to like spin a wheel and one of us was going to end up with soup. One was going to end up—

Tommy: which you can't do any of these. But I thought in my support for you, would have you eaten Natural Confectionery? Would have you eaten that while you're a vegetarian?

Josh: So if I was to eat these, what would that make me? And not, not a vegetarian, but what would I be?

Tommy: I mean, there are vegetarians that are pretty loose that still sort of eat lollies and, you know, things that have some form of animal products. I'm sure there's people eating parmesan cheese.

Mason: What's the deal with eggs?

Tommy: Yeah, thanks for asking.

Josh: Eggs?

Tommy: No, eggs are poultry. It's a part of— it's—

Mason: so it's what?

Tommy: No, so hang on, wait, wait, wait. People— the thing is, they haven't had to kill an animal. Yeah, they haven't had to kill an animal. That's the whole—

Josh: aren't all eggs just little chickens that haven't been—

Tommy: no, that's not— that's not correct. Are you honestly fucking saying that? No, they aren't.

Mason: They just haven't been— the eggs haven't been fertilized.

Tommy: But then there's no living thing within it. That's the whole—

Josh: It's not a question, Mr. Perfect.

Tommy: No, you guys—

Josh: Wait, so you're saying we're wrong?

Tommy: Look it up. I'm happy to be wrong, but I don't think that—

Josh: No, you're not.

Tommy: I'm happy to be wrong, but I don't think that eggs that you eat are—

Josh: No, they're never going to turn into little chickens necessarily, but they're like part of the They're ready for a little chicken.

Tommy: Yeah, it's an egg.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: What are the eggs designed for?

Tommy: Yeah, I don't know. Have a look. So they're non-fertilized eggs is what you're saying.

Josh: That's what 97 said.

Tommy: You're trying to go that that's why they're not vegetarian. That's why you're trying to go, how are they vegetarian if they are eggs?

Mason: Kroger says eggs are off limits for vegans, but all good for veggos.

Josh: Yeah, yeah. But so that's what I thought. Yeah.

Mason: Trev Long joined, by the way. I saw his little feature on A Current Affair on, um, Split payment banking apps.

Josh: Oh yeah, it was great. What was he saying?

Mason: Oh, just the new, um, banking apps. You can split money easily between your friends here.

Josh: Did you get any text messages last night?

Tommy: Uh, yeah, we'll get to that. But I'll, um, so just without, without derailing my fucking thing that I'm doing here, do you want to know?

Mason: I don't know.

Tommy: No, it's all good, it's all good, it's all good.

Josh: So you're not doing it? Well, no, but I'm curious as to what is— what am I— what am I— if I was to eat these lollies, what does that make me, 97?

Mason: What do you mean? What do you mean?

Josh: The other day, uh, Jase Hawkins on his radio show was, uh, doing the sausage sizzle at the Hampton Bowls Club, and there was a little girl who was saying, I can't eat them. Because I'm a polo pescatarian.

Tommy: The fuck is that? Polo chicken. She owns—

Mason: she eats chicken and fish.

Josh: Yeah.

Mason: So you want to be a gelatin vegetarian?

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Yeah. And do I get all the benefits? Is this going— because I'm not— I'm trying not to do vegetarian. I'm trying to do vegetarian so that I, um, can help with inflammation. Is a party mix bad for inflammation?

Tommy: Yeah, but hang on, so this is where I'm just trying to— I think, I think you're just trying to establish the understanding of the rules of a vegetarian. And so this is why I was getting this, because I didn't know this shit. I just ate all of this stuff.

Josh: Well, you're not a vegetarian.

Tommy: Yeah, but I don't think— I think that's where you— non-vegetarians don't think about what they're eating, they just eat.

Josh: So these— so yeah, so there was the gelatin in that gelatin in the—

Tommy: Yeah, so the— So the gelatin, it's from animal bones. The cheese, which is specifically hard cheese, not brie— brie you can eat, Josh. Soft cheeses, soft cheeses, hard cheeses. So that specific— read the ingredients of that Parmesan. Parmesan. Parmesan.

Josh: Parmesan.

Mason: Sean Connery.

Tommy: What's in the Parmesan?

Josh: It's Dr. Evil.

Tommy: What's in it? What's in it?

Josh: Um, ingredients: unpasteurized cow's milk, salt, animal rennet.

Tommy: Okay, so animal rennet is the lining of animals' intestines. Oh, so that's what you got there. So it's like Parmesan cheese. Yeah, Parmesan cheese. And so then you got, um, pumpkin syrup.

Josh: Do we have any veggos on the Instagram that are saying whether I can— like, what the deal is?

Tommy: What's It's so— I remember there would be like, uh, I had a friend who was a vegetarian when we were younger, and I think he might still be, but he, um, he wouldn't eat like chicken chips, chicken-flavored chips, or with chicken salt. Yeah, wouldn't eat any of that. Yeah, he just flat out nothing, no animal products. And so, I mean, you could do the final goodbye. No, no, no, I'm like, but I want to support you. Like, I did this because I'm like How can I support you? I don't want you falling off the veggie, veggie wagon.

Josh: I guess the thing is that when you're hungry, what happens with Fat Fridays?

Tommy: You can get your own fucking Fat Fridays. This is a different approach. We can mix it up. Yeah, didn't have to be you just being a pig on camera.

Josh: Is that what you wanted? No, but the Fat Fridays, it's normally—

Tommy: At least this is content.

Josh: Yeah, no, but I guess the thing with Fat Fridays is like, especially like I didn't eat anything or whatever because I was—

Tommy: You don't eat anything anyway.

Josh: I know, but I was sort of primed to it.

Mason: I'm sort of glad I got my smoothie. Anyway, Crocker says, "Polo pescatarian, that's crazy." White wine is also filtered through fish scales.

Tommy: Yeah. It says on it, well, it says on it, "May contain fish or eggs." Emma says, "You can get loads of cheese these days with veggie rennet." Veggie rennet?

Josh: That's good.

Tommy: What, the intestines of what vegetable? Or they just have called it vegetable rennet. I mean, it's like vegans who you're not a vegan, but vegans who don't do eggs that can't have things like Amaretto Sours or like some cocktails because they use egg white. But then there's another version, which is the vegan-friendly one.

Mason: They use the—

Tommy: so they soak chickpeas in water and then they use the water from the chickpeas. And then that does the same thing. And so there is, I can see, I know when you're hungry, 'cause you do, You feel like you're so hungry, and that's why you got a bit grumpy because I didn't bring food. I actually do know the funny thing is I thought on the way back, I bet you Josh will be a bit pissed because I didn't get actual food to eat. Yeah, but then I was like, and then I was like, maybe it's just a better content play of actually talking about some shit that you would probably eat if you were eating vegetarian pasta.

Josh: I definitely like the idea of, um, ah, you know what, when you went down to pick something up, I thought this was the armband thing all over again. I crack the shit and then you go, no, I've got you something that's vegetarian.

Tommy: We can get it, but I just thought we don't need to watch you eat.

Josh: So you got everything for you.

Tommy: I'm not gonna eat any of it.

Josh: From an empathy point of view, uh, I feel like having barbecues and stuff now, I would— I'm much more likely— I used to add bacon into everything. I'd make a smashed avocado.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: And I'd cut up bits of bacon and mix it into the smashed avocado.

Mason: It's like guacamole with bacon.

Josh: Yeah.

Mason: Yeah. Great.

Josh: Yeah, it's really yum. But I feel like nowadays if I was doing that, I would— if I was to cook the bacon for people, I'd put it in a separate bowl and then people could mix it in separately.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: So making base veggie options.

Tommy: It's nice. Yeah.

Mason: So, you know, that VeggieRennet, it's enzymes collected from fig leaves, melons, and safflower.

Tommy: It's a lot of work, isn't it? Yeah, it's crazy. The thing is, how do we work out this shit? Like, how do we work out that let's use this animal's intestine? Isn't that fucked up how we've got to that point? I think it's probably based on there's so much left over from this poor animal.

Josh: You've got to use every bit of it.

Tommy: How can we work out how to do this? Anyway, and that's how they worked out the sausage thing. So, but yeah, so this is an interesting one. Like, I reckon you would have eaten these if I didn't bring this to the attention.

Josh: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tommy: You reckon?

Josh: Yeah, yeah, because the thing is, I would have still— I know that there's gelatin. Yeah, but I would have thought that it was vegan. Like, I would have thought, ah, it's vegan, you get away with it.

Mason: Yeah.

Tommy: So the question now is, moving forward, do you think you, you are going to consider products that have gelatin in them?

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: Or what about even like soups that have chicken stock as a base?

Mason: Look, in all honesty, I think, I think you should just maybe forego the soup with a stock base because you're going to get the benefits of the veggies. Josh needs soup. I reckon you could—

Josh: I need veggies. You know what I mean?

Mason: I reckon you could, I reckon you could push the boundary on that one.

Josh: Just couldn't I just use veggie stock?

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Mason: But if you're buying it from—

Josh: Did you have to go through and specifically make sure that they all had the animal?

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did my due diligence. Aged for 12 months. Yeah. So I looked, there's a bunch of parmesan that's in like a, like it's already grated for the lazy folk. I.e. me, can't be fucked. It's so annoying grating this shit.

Josh: Graters are one of the hardest things to clean.

Tommy: Oh, I hate it.

Mason: No, it's, it's white. It tastes better than the pre-grated shit.

Tommy: No, I know it does, but I can't be fucked.

Josh: This is a funny, like, grated cheese as an industry.

Tommy: They'd be making so much money. Yeah, so much. It's such a markup on it.

Mason: They're literally like 1-star health rating, those bags of cheese.

Josh: But it's also like a big thing of cheese would be the same, no?

Mason: I don't know, that's— I can't find actual cheese blocks with Health Star ratings on them.

Josh: And what does the Health Star rating even fucking mean?

Tommy: I don't know, mate.

Josh: Based on what?

Mason: I think it's like salt and stuff.

Tommy: Any— anyway, it's an interesting one. I, I'll support you on your quest to be a vegetarian, and so I've brought to the attention, yeah, a few products that you cannot go near.

Josh: Thank you.

Tommy: Unless you choose.

Josh: Uh, so I was talking about your phone and text messages.

Tommy: Oh yeah, so last night I'm at the gym and I fucking just start getting a flurry of text messages and I couldn't even work it out. I looked at the name and there was a name that came up so it looked like it was a contact in my phone. I'm like, I don't fucking know that person. Is this someone that I used to go to the club with? Or like, you know when you got numbers in your phone from years ago? It's like, I clicked on it and I was like, it says audio or FaceTime, and I was like, okay, maybe they are in my phone. And then I clicked onto the information and it's got no number there.

Josh: Well, what's the name?

Tommy: Rick Astley. And so then I read the text messages. Hey Tommy. Next message. We're no strangers to love. Next message. You know the rules and so do I. Next message. Full commitment's what I'm thinking of. Next message. You wouldn't get this from any other guy. Next message. I just want to tell you how I'm feeling. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I still didn't get it. I kind of understand who Rick Astley is. And then at the bottom it says, sent to you, Tommy, by one of your mates via ricktext— t-x-t— so ricktext.com. Clicked on that. Some gronk has spent, and I'm flattered, $3.50 through PayPal to send me what they describe as 1.5 seconds between each message. The next song line just keeps coming. Um, 110% satisfied customers. 75 seconds of text messages will flood the phone.

Josh: Do you understand what it is? What happened?

Tommy: It's a song. It's song lyrics.

Josh: You were Rickrolled. Yeah, but I mean, you know that or no?

Tommy: But I think it— yeah, the funny thing about the Rickrolled, which is an old like It was really popular at one point. I don't know how it became popular. It was like you'd send something. It was like a meme or something.

Josh: There was like, you got Rickrolled. My mate used to always say it to me and I was like, so the idea is you would send someone a link or whatever and they were going off thinking that it was something. They'll click through and it was never going to give you up. Never get that song.

Tommy: Yeah. And so, this is the text message version, which kind of drops flat when, when I'm just in there trying to figure out, do I know this person?

Josh: Or, railed you either way.

Tommy: Didn't rattle me at all. I was like, I actually thought about texting you because I was like, didn't fucking you do it? And did you do it?

Josh: No, it wasn't me. Who was it? It happened to me.

Tommy: It happened to you?

Josh: It happened to me. And it was because—

Mason: How did they get your number?

Josh: Well, it was Trev.

Tommy: Trevor Long.

Josh: Trevor Long.

Tommy: Trevor Long has dropped $7. I mean, he might have gotten the premium.

Josh: It was a $5. I think he did the full song at $5.

Tommy: Oh, $5. The whole song, $5 USD, or was he—

Josh: I don't know. But he, um, Yeah, I was on the WhatsApp with him and then all of a sudden I got all this. Oh, are you kidding me?

Mason: No, just smell it. It's torture.

Tommy: I'm just smelling.

Mason: Just wave it under Josh's nose. Might as well do that.

Josh: I feel my head hurts, so we're gonna have to finish it up soon. But the, um, I'm gonna have to— I'm seriously gonna order some Uber Eats.

Mason: Maybe, um, that grain salad was great.

Josh: Maybe Patch don't do the waffles anymore, do they? But I could definitely do the waffles.

Tommy: There's lots of options. So, so hang on, you got them too? What time did you get them?

Josh: Oh no, I got mine first and then Trev asked for your number when it was all sort of done.

Tommy: So you've ratted on Trev.

Josh: Yeah. Yeah.

Tommy: So I got, yeah, so I got a, it was probably 8:30 or something and it just keeps going and going. The phone goes nuts and then you're in there.

Mason: Every 30 seconds or minute?

Josh: Every, every like second.

Tommy: 1.5 seconds.

Josh: Yeah, it's like foom, foom, foom.

Mason: That's great.

Josh: It's a lot of messages. How are you?

Tommy: That's a lot of money, I think. Hang on, why did he do it?

Josh: I think it's just a fun thing. I'm guessing he found the service, he wanted to try it out, and he knew that it would rattle you. I know that you're saying it didn't rattle you, but you're like, I was just trying to figure out who it was. It seems like you're right.

Tommy: It's pretty obvious that it's some kind of bullshit. It's nice that it reveals at the end that it's the ricktext.com. Yeah, because then you can go down the rabbit hole. It's actually great fucking marketing. How can we do the, the Gronk Flurry or the You just—

Josh: Cronk, flurry.

Tommy: So, it's like a flurry of messages.

Josh: Yeah, that would be— I mean—

Mason: And an ice cream.

Josh: Yeah, at the end you get an ice cream.

Mason: Does it have gelatin? What does that have in it?

Josh: Oh, no.

Mason: McFlurry. Can you have a McFlurry?

Josh: I don't think I can have any.

Tommy: You know what the thing is?

Mason: Can you have Macca's?

Tommy: But isn't this clearly like ignorance is bliss? It's like when you— This is, I think, as much as I haven't decided or not, you know, whether I'm going to go vegetarian or not. It definitely has made me think more about it. And so when you are just totally tuned out and don't give a fuck, you just don't care and it doesn't do anything. But as soon as you start placing any thought onto it, it's like, fuck, what have I been doing all this time? Yeah.

Josh: Do you feel like that? Yeah, no, definitely. I feel low blood sugar, to be honest, right now. I need to— one thing that I was thinking in regards— so I had a mandarin yesterday.

Tommy: I'll take him off the table. You're actually— Josh is drooling if you can't see.

Josh: Yeah, I do feel a bit sort of salivary, but The, um, uh, mandarins. I was just wondering, I bought mandarins a while ago. They've been in the fridge. I was starting to eat the— I had one of the mandarins yesterday and there was like 4 seeds to a single slice.

Tommy: Yeah, that's what I remember how I was saying. Yeah, I was fucking pulling them in my hand. It's fucked.

Josh: Do you think that the longer they stay in the fridge, the more seeds?

Mason: It's not going to grow more seeds now.

Tommy: Oh, dude.

Josh: Okay, well, that's what I was wondering.

Mason: No, no, no, I was thinking maybe it was like an overripe— No, they'd have to use a fruit. No, that'd have to be attached to the tree to grow more seeds.

Tommy: But that's— Yeah, because then you would think that, you know, even then it wouldn't just— How do they do seedless? You're saying like if there's seedless ones, the longer you'd have the seedless sold watermelons, they would start growing seeds? Is that same thing?

Josh: No, no, because there wasn't a seed to start with. I know that my thinking is wrong.

Tommy: But how do you know there was a seed to start with? How do you know there wasn't 4 seeds to start with?

Josh: Well, that's what I'm thinking, but it just seems excessive. So, I was like, if there's so many seeds, I was like, maybe it all started with one and then it fucking had another one or some shit.

Tommy: It's a funny thought.

Josh: It's not a funny thought. It's a serious thought.

Tommy: It's a funny— It's a weird thought. It's a Kramer thought.

Josh: Did you find out about the eggs, by the way? What eggs are if they could ever be chickens?

Tommy: No, you didn't type that in? No.

Mason: What? No, it was, it was too big.

Tommy: Did you read out anything from the—

Mason: I got, I got a bit distracted.

Josh: And what are, what are yolks? Yolks, I'm guessing, are like the— because you know how sometimes you can see an egg and it's got a bit of blood or something? Like, that was like the chicken that could have been.

Tommy: Yeah, I know, but I used to— this is all the shit I'd say as a kid, and I was totally thinking, oh, I'm eating small chickens that haven't been born.

Josh: And that's not true, is that what you're saying?

Tommy: From what I read when I was younger, it's not true. I mean, I could— I can pull out my phone and start searching it. It's quite an easy thing to Google.

Mason: No, sorry, I'm just trying to— Kroger said mandarin seeds from— come from dried gelatin.

Tommy: So, Kroger's just talking.

Josh: Yeah, it's a blinky bill.

Mason: He's all, I think Macca's ice cream had pig fat in it, but—

Tommy: Oh, back in the day, remember that?

Josh: Lard is like— All soft serve, I think, is made of that.

Tommy: Well, I remember them saying that. Can you actually confirm that?

Josh: Because— One thing at a time.

Tommy: Yeah, no, baby.

Josh: I want to know the egg thing.

Mason: Okay. Do you want to Google the egg thing or do you want me to Google it?

Tommy: You Google the egg thing. I think it will require sort of faster typing to get us it first. But does Macca's use lard, which is the fat? Because I remember—

Josh: No, just say, is Macca's soft serve? We don't use lard.

Tommy: Some people think. There is some kind of lard or animal fats in our frying oil. No, so that's it.

Josh: No, type in vegetarian ice cream McDonald's.

Tommy: You reckon they'll do it?

Josh: Definitely.

Tommy: Vegetarian ice cream McDonald's.

Josh: Yeah, so, um, I mean, we've been very vegetarian heavy this week because it does become very consuming. I feel like I spend most of my time trying to work out what I'm going to eat next.

Tommy: There is no use of animal fat. Yeah, in their ice cream.

Josh: So is it vegetarian?

Tommy: Garden salads, obviously, and ice cream are both vegetarian. So you're all good. You can keep eating.

Josh: So I can go and get a 55-cent cone after this if I wanted to.

Tommy: You could, you could if you want to make that decision.

Mason: So the eggs that you buy and eat are eggs that never had a baby chicken growing inside them. Because they were never fertilised by the father chicken or the rooster. And it looks like the yolk is— For the white yolk, it forms around the fertilised or unfertilised egg yolks. So, the whites are the protective thing around the yolk. So, from the sounds of things—

Josh: So, this chicken—

Mason: Not a bit. It looks like the chicken comes from the yolk.

Josh: If a chicken has sex with a rooster, That egg, it would inseminate. Is that what it's called?

Mason: I think.

Tommy: Well, I don't know how it's— It's not in there right now.

Mason: Is that big?

Tommy: It's a very small level. I mean, you got to think about the size of a chicken's penis. Does it even have one? Surely it does.

Josh: But the penis doesn't have to penetrate.

Tommy: Does a chicken have a penis? Can you look at that?

Josh: But the chicken rooster, the rooster.

Tommy: Oh, sorry, rooster. Oh my God. He's found some rooster.

Mason: Here we go. National Geographic, how chickens lost their penises.

Tommy: What? Hang on, what? You should have seen his face.

Josh: Yeah, what's that?

Tommy: What have you found?

Mason: I mean, you're right, they're measuring a duck penis.

Tommy: We don't want to see that.

Mason: It's what they led with. It's literally like a video the whole size of the website.

Josh: And so was it chicken? Because cows, uh, cows are female bulls or whatever.

Tommy: Yeah, no, no, cows are females, bulls are males. Yeah, correct. But I think, yeah, you're right, chickens Females. Lovely ladies.

Josh: And then the roosters are the males. And so roosters obviously don't make eggs.

Tommy: No, they don't.

Josh: So, the thing is, we're talking about penis size of the rooster. But I don't actually think it matters.

Tommy: Yeah, I know. Because you think about, like, if you think about—

Josh: Because when you make someone pregnant, Your penis isn't penetrating their eggs.

Tommy: No, no, I know, I know, this is crazy.

Josh: Okay, all right, guys.

Mason: The rooster injects sperm into a hen by pressing his vents against hers in a process known as a cloacal kiss. The cloaca is the chamber just inside the vent where the digestive, urinary, and reproductive tract ends. The rooster's cloaca contains two tiny nipples at the end of the two ducts that transport semen from the rooster's testes. The testes are hidden inside—

Josh: Is testes a medical term?

Mason: Yeah, the testes are inside the rooster near his backbone and look like a pair of large white beans. To transfer semen into a hen, the two cloacal, uh, nipples serve as the rooster's mating organs.

Josh: So it's two—

Tommy: They've got no dicks. The rooster doesn't have a dick. So it's got like two—

Josh: I'm just imagining two fucking aircons. Yeah, just doing a bit of that. Two vents.

Tommy: That's amazing.

Josh: Is there any videos?

Mason: I mean, uh, no, not on this website. During the cloacal kiss, the hen squats, the rooster does a balancing act on her back, and when everything is working right, the hen lifts up her tail to one side while the rooster bends down— bends his tail downwards for the kiss.

Josh: So, what is it? What do you call it? A cloacal kiss?

Mason: It's a cloacal kiss.

Tommy: I was thinking, you know how people call, you know, blokes roosters? I don't think you can use that term.

Josh: Well, you call yourself a rooster.

Tommy: Yeah, but I've just realised I was saying that I've got no dick.

Josh: Yeah, you've just got a vent.

Tommy: I'm just doing little kisses.

Josh: And so, you were saying hen. So, is a chicken a hen?

Mason: Yes.

Josh: A female.

Mason: A female's a hen.

Josh: Hen. Yeah. And so, was chicken a—

Tommy: There's no male chickens.

Josh: Is chicken— Could a chicken be a male or a female?

Tommy: Because that's a good point.

Josh: Is chicken sort of the category?

Tommy: But then how about this? It's just a— maybe, maybe then the male chickens can have sex with the hens and then the roosters are just some sort of—

Mason: Try and get the rooster in your brain. No, no, no. A male chicken is a rooster.

Tommy: Okay.

Mason: So, so there's not two different—

Josh: Female chicken is a hen.

Tommy: Hens and roosters is basically the categories.

Josh: But a rooster is a chicken.

Tommy: No, uh, the—

Josh: yes, is it a male chicken?

Mason: Yes.

Josh: Does that mean that a cow— sorry, a bull is a male cow?

Tommy: No.

Josh: Why?

Tommy: Because it's with— yeah, so then what's the, um, do we have any Instagram? Because then what we're trying to do is we're working out like, I'm trying to understand the categories. So you've got humans and you've got male genitalia, female genitalia. And then you've got all the ones you want to identify with, or you— there is, you know, biologically some people have both. And so then you, you categorising like that. So we've got, we're saying chickens. Yeah. And then you have roosters and then you have hens.

Josh: Exactly.

Tommy: And then we're trying to go cows.

Josh: Cattle, maybe? No.

Mason: So a bull is an intact adult male of the species Bos taurus, which is a cattle.

Josh: Okay.

Tommy: So Bos taurus and then is a cow.

Josh: You saying Bos taurus? Have you ever said Bos taurus before?

Tommy: I just thought it was an easy word to say. It sounded Like, I want to— It sounds like a good word.

Mason: Maybe it's Taurus.

Tommy: Taurus.

Josh: I'd love to learn more about all this animal stuff.

Mason: The genus and, um, what do they call it? What do you have? The, like, genus, family, and it's like the scientific terminology for all the different families of species.

Josh: How could we? Because I didn't learn any of this in school. I don't know anything.

Tommy: But what for?

Josh: Well, for this, like, for these kinds of things.

Tommy: Aren't we learning right now? Yeah, just learning.

Josh: So, that's what's so cool about this.

Tommy: This is why we have a podcast, because we're a couple of gronks that don't have much idea about much.

Josh: So how could we, um, because I was thinking about every single day learning about a country. I got a book of every, uh, every country in the world, and I was thinking of every day researching, spending an hour learning about a country.

Tommy: I think when you sort of do it at a grand level like that across, it's like we do it every day.

Josh: How many countries do you reckon there are in the world?

Tommy: Um, I was going to say 52, but that's the states in America. Yeah, I don't know.

Josh: 50 states in America? 50?

Mason: 51? I thought it was 50.

Tommy: I had—

Mason: I thought 52.

Josh: I know 52 is— there's 52 weeks in a year. Maybe there is 52.

Tommy: One of my clients when I was a personal trainer, he knew every— all of them, because you can— you'd go through the alphabet. Um, Arkansas, you know, like you go A, B, C, and they've all got one. Actually, probably not.

Josh: How many states in the US?

Mason: 50.

Tommy: 50. Yeah. Anyway, I don't think you need to sort of wrap it up in this sort of grand, every single day I'm going to show up.

Josh: How many countries do you reckon there are in the world?

Tommy: I don't know. I don't know.

Mason: Dr. K just joined. More than 100.

Tommy: Dr. K? Countries in the world?

Josh: Is that what Dr. K said, or are you guessing?

Mason: No, no, that was Dr. K's guess.

Josh: Dr. K. Thanks, Dr. K. More than 100 countries. I feel like I'd love a specific number, but that's okay. I did have it.

Mason: Yeah, Kroger said dirt talk with Mr. 97. There's a podcast in this.

Josh: Dirty talk.

Tommy: Yeah, dirty talk.

Josh: Definitely.

Tommy: I think animals mating habits and how they— what about they achieve—

Josh: so the LA Facts, the LA Facts stuff has gone quite well, I think.

Tommy: Well, it's because we're interested in it. We've all got investment in it.

Josh: Could we do, um, one day a week like an animal, like a science fact?

Tommy: This is—

Mason: I have to be just on animals, or can it just be a science fact? I prefer science fact.

Tommy: I mean, the good—

Josh: no, I like the idea of specifically— I feel like I've got a huge blind spot in regards to animals.

Tommy: But maybe just find your own time. I'll tell you this, but that's what I literally said, 864 seconds. This is Harper. I thought it was really good.

Mason: He posted this today, this morning, and I was like, what's Harp doing?

Tommy: What's 864 seconds even mean? And he said, 864 seconds is 1% of your day. 14 minutes and 24 seconds in total. What if for the next 28 days you invested 864 seconds doing the thing you keep delaying, deferring, and denying? The meditation, the cardio, the decluttering, the playing, the reading, the writing, the stretching, you know, the thing. You might just create some shift, some calm, relief, clarity. It might even be the most valuable 1% of your day.

Josh: And so So isn't that an argument that I should do my one country a day?

Tommy: Oh, you can, 100%.

Mason: For 14 minutes.

Tommy: Yeah, but no, you said an hour. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you struggle to stick into a whole bunch of stuff, and that's where I just flag. What I appreciate is you're sticking to the vegetarian thing. That's fucking commendable, bro.

Josh: Well, because I could have had the— you know that I could have just had those lollies.

Tommy: I wasn't gonna let you. Don't think I'm gonna—

Josh: Are you fucking kidding me? You're literally like, you're like, oh, you have some. You literally said this could be your final hurrah.

Tommy: If you decided that you wanted to do your final hurrah, I would be happy to be here by your side to support you through it.

Josh: My final hurrah was Saturday last week. Yeah. Anyway, what's the LA fact?

Tommy: 97?

Mason: LA fact of the day. Animals are banned.

Josh: Okay. An animal fact for an LA fact. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tommy: It's good.

Josh: It's more heavy.

Mason: It's fitting, isn't it?

Tommy: It's great.

Mason: Animals are banned from mating publicly publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

Tommy: Who's enforcing that?

Mason: I don't know.

Josh: And I mean, it's very hard when you're trying to fucking analyse if vents are touching. What's that called again? Colloquial—

Mason: uh, clo— cloacal?

Tommy: Colloquial kiss?

Mason: I think it's cloacal kiss.

Josh: Yeah, cloacal kiss.

Tommy: Cloacal.

Josh: I love it. What is cloacal? If you actually look up cloacal kiss as a definition, what is cloacal kiss? What is it defined as?

Tommy: How do you spell cloacal?

Mason: C-L-O-A-C-A-L.

Tommy: Cloacal. Cloak and then— he's fast, isn't he? So fast.

Josh: How's our internet?

Tommy: I mean, don't give him excuses. He hasn't read it one time.

Josh: He just keeps doing faces.

Mason: No, I'm just, just on images. I'm just looking.

Josh: No, we don't need— this is where he goes down the rabbit hole of going to Google.

Mason: You want to understand it though?

Josh: Yeah, if you just type in define colon—

Mason: Oh, you—

Tommy: Okay.

Josh: Uh, and then cloacal kiss. Is cloacal kiss actually in the dictionary, or even the word cloacal? What are people saying on Instagram? I feel like Dr. K would have an answer.

Tommy: We can work it out.

Mason: Not yet.

Tommy: I mean, the kiss pit. The kiss is where they mate together, so you just referred to that action.

Mason: Okay, so the cloaca is a common cavity at the end of the digestive tract for the release of both excretory— excretory, I'm guessing— and genital products in vertebrates except most mammals and certain invertebrates.

Tommy: So do we have a vocal?

Mason: Also archaic, a sewer.

Josh: Vertebrates, do we even— that's a dumb question. Vertebrates, is that different to a—

Tommy: it's the bones in your spine.

Josh: Yeah, that's your spine. That's fine.

Tommy: Vertebrae.

Josh: Okay, good.

Mason: Oh, frogs have them as well.

Josh: Oh, what do they have, vents or cloacles?

Tommy: All right, Mr. 97, anything that you missed, this is your time to redeem the 80% that you had on.

Mason: Great. Uh, Talia tuned in from New York City.

Josh: Oh, thank you, Talia.

Tommy: I saw some photos on Insta, they look sick.

Mason: Great.

Tommy: Uh, skating the ice skating rings, they've brought it out.

Josh: Oh great, uh, seems early.

Tommy: That's what I thought too.

Mason: Closing the loop on the testosterone and free testosterone, Lani says you always have a high level of total testosterone than free testosterone.

Josh: Oh, so you're fucked.

Mason: So maybe I've, I've rigged the—

Tommy: no, so what is— what she's saying is you should test the testosterone— well, testosterone free. Is that what she just said? Can you just read that again?

Mason: You will always have a high level of total testosterone than free testosterone.

Josh: Can you look up what's the difference between free and total? Surely that's the first thing you did last night.

Tommy: Yeah, I did. And so the total testosterone is with throughout the whole body, like they're a much smaller number. This is why I was like, oh no, we got to work this out. So because what I can do, whatever you got, whatever Mr. 97 ends up speaking to them about and testing, I can then just get that test if it's the case. Because it's annoying that I'd have to— I don't know why you just—

Josh: I guess which is the better one?

Tommy: Well, from that I took that the total, the more clear is the testosterone free.

Josh: Because, because total maybe can be dietary. I don't know, like, is there more?

Tommy: Mr. Nice Haven found anything?

Mason: Free testosterone is referred to as bioavailable testosterone, and that's what we need.

Josh: There's no point having a bunch of testosterone if it's not bioavailable. Yeah, Daniel Gray.

Tommy: Yeah, what do we got on hand? What have we got on the shelf that we can take out?

Josh: It's like, uh, having money in the bank that you can't touch. We're only doing accessible cash.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: And so do I need a theoretical network?

Mason: Your body actively uses free testosterone molecules since they are at liberty to enter the body's cells.

Josh: I have a feeling that I would have a higher total testosterone—

Mason: is a measure of how much testosterone you have in your blood in total, both, both, both free and bound.

Tommy: Oh, so you think that will give you the—

Josh: what's bound testosterone?

Mason: I think it's like bound to like cells and molecules.

Josh: I think my total testosterone would smash all of you guys. But I think free—

Mason: what does that testosterone—

Josh: well, because I just don't think I'm accessing it that much. Well, because I'm not doing all the weights and stuff, it's all like stuck to my cells.

Tommy: That's like saying I don't know if I've got more energy than you. Why? Well, I've got more body fat than you.

Josh: Exactly. But is that not true? If we were— I'm not joking— if we were in a—

Tommy: if we're in a situation where you're like, nah, we're starving.

Josh: I probably live longer. No, I have an excess energy.

Mason: Maybe, maybe you'll have more muscles and fat to break down for energy than we will, so you will. Yeah, you'll last longer.

Tommy: Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate the thing.

Josh: It's just, you agree. I mean, Tommy might probably do it.

Tommy: Tommy might agree that fat bits, animals, but you're saying stuff about the— I might be able to use a boulder to cave one's head in to be able to eat and survive.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: Well, and the good thing— but we're in the same tribe, and every tribe needs the perfect one that can go out.

Mason: You'd be a great meal though.

Josh: High fat, bit of avocado, a little bit of gyros. Yeah, get him on this bit. But I'm the one that ever— that you guys have to ration because I'm so tasty that only everyone gets a little bit of Josh. All right, this is gonna last for the next—

Tommy: it always has.

Josh: It's also the one that, um, yeah, everyone gets their rice, you can all sort of think everyone's fighting over the bitter, bitter josh. Yeah, but then you've got the vegetarians who you don't mix the josh into the—

Tommy: But we all know how it would come out the other end.

Josh: Yeah, not ideal. All right, it's a daily talk show. Any, anything, any reviews or anything?

Mason: Nah, no reviews.

Tommy: So just one thing, you're— you think you're thing that you're getting tested will give you both of those. Based on what she said, a testosterone test will test for both attached.

Mason: I literally just asked for testosterone.

Tommy: So did I. That was the problem, right? I don't— I didn't even know this fucking other thing existed. Even Harp said to me, who I asked what should I do, he said go to a GP, ask to cheque your levels. And so that's all we did. So it's interesting that we've got this— there's a bit of a spanner in the works here, guys. I think we'll We'll be able to sort it out.

Mason: Yeah, I mean we can just ask right?

Josh: Who?

Mason: The doctor— the pathologist.

Josh: Yeah, the pathologist is going to be useless.

Tommy: No no because they're the ones doing it and taking it so you can just ask them 'is this free testosterone?' If it's at an actual pathologist versus using a nurse because I called the place where I got it which was done by a nurse not of the pathologists sure in a pathologist clinic it was just a nurse clinic clinic, but they're the ones who spin it up and figure out— pathologists are the ones that do that, send it off. And anyway, she couldn't answer my question.

Josh: That's what I mean.

Tommy: She said the doctor—

Josh: but they also— the thing is that if you're getting your blood done, uh, it's all fucking baked in. They've got the referral.

Mason: The doctor would know as well, because if, if you went to go get free testosterone and it measured your total, then they'd be like, oof, your levels are high. So your GP would know which test that you're going for.

Josh: The question, I guess, is if you get your total testosterone, is that going to be 2 markers? If it's 2 markers, that's fine, which is—

Tommy: yeah.

Josh: And if I— and then if you got one, then you can just go get the total one. Worst case scenario, we can say we're just taking free.

Tommy: Yeah, we're just—

Josh: yeah.

Tommy: So I'm hoping Mr. 97 gets both, and then I get one, and then we can just go with the free. Yeah, because we should all have—

Mason: she booked me in for like folate and B12 and iron.

Josh: What's folate? I don't know, good for your nails maybe. I feel like Kellogg's, all their cereals have a lot of folate maybe.

Tommy: All right guys, I'm really fucking hungry now. This has backfired on me.

Josh: Why haven't you had it? I mean, you're not vegetarian, but it's because—

Tommy: No, I'm supporting you. I'm going to put him into the jar. The great thing is, dude, I think it's super commendable. I'm not fucking joking when I said that before. You don't stick at much, but this is something you're sticking at, and your wife is actually sticking at it too.

Josh: The thing is, it's not that hard. Really?

Mason: I mean, it's hard. Especially when you get your Uber Eats from—

Josh: where do you go?

Mason: Veggie Bar or whatever.

Josh: The thing is though, that if it's— I mean, I've done a million diets before.

Tommy: But never this.

Josh: No. And so this is— I could actually—

Tommy: I was thinking walking around the aisles, I was like, this is actually genius because it like just removing the hard rule of none of that forces your hand to start thinking more about what you're going to have.

Josh: And so I think that I will get to a point like I had a juice with all different like carrot and stuff. It's a good— that's good. And so I'm moving that, and that was the whole point why I did juice fasting back in the day, is it's like, oh, I'm going to start getting more plants and veggies.

Mason: Like, you went too hard. You went way too hard on that.

Josh: But also, I went from doing a 12-day juice fast, and then my first meal was a—

Mason: you did like a garlic green one?

Josh: No, no, you know, a chicken— that was a chicken curry with coconut rice as my first meal.

Mason: Like, yeah, what was wrong with that?

Josh: I mean, it's super rich. You're meant to do like salads with not much dressing and stuff to start with because you haven't got any sugar.

Tommy: It was a crash diet though. The thing about vegetarian diets, they're not crash diets, it's a lifestyle. It's like saying I'm going to start eating healthier.

Josh: There's, yeah, there's the healthy— like Bree, one of the reasons that we watched Game Changers was because, um, which is now available on Netflix, by the way. Yeah, it's good, good fact. Um, Bri was at a shoot the other day and there were 6 people, uh, in the room working on the shoot. Bri was the only non-vegetarian on that whole shoot, and they're all like saying, oh, you should give it— you gotta watch this doco and all that sort of thing. But then one of the girls said, I, um, had a friend that went vegetarian and she just ate pasta and hot chips and she got so fat. So there is that risk. And so I'm trying to like dial it in.

Tommy: Like, I think your fear of being fat is, is there. So then the, you know, you won't do that because you, it would just fuck you up.

Josh: Well, the thing is, I'm not having, uh, I'm not relying on cheese. Cheese can sometimes be in like a burrito or whatever, there's a little bit of cheese or whatever, but I'm not having blocks of cheese.

Tommy: So that's one thing I think is good because you can't have your salami with it.

Josh: The other thing too is I'm not having, um Um, uh, like lollies and stuff. Like, I actually have like the worst thing that I've had from a dessert perspective is like 85% chocolate. So that's good. Anyway, all right guys, uh, glad we got to talk food again. If you've got any tips, I, I do need some. I think that the recipes—

Mason: I reckon send through any great vegetarian recipes.

Tommy: Send through any tips on how to get a guy that doesn't cook to start cooking. That's where we start, not the recipes.

Josh: Yeah, true.

Mason: No, but I mean, I could do with some great vegetarian recipes.

Josh: Well, so the other thing How do you, in a vegetarian diet, start the gasco's? No, how do you, how do you lose fat?

Tommy: Train, eat veggies.

Josh: I mean, yeah, do that. So that's two things you don't want to do, train and eat veggies. I eat some veggies, but I understand that I need to—

Mason: I mean, your dinner last night was like pan-fried broccoli.

Josh: Yeah, don't know about that. What do you mean, don't know about that?

Mason: Steamed.

Josh: Okay, okay.

Tommy: Enough.

Josh: All right, it's a daily talk show. hidethedailytalkshow.com is the email address if you do have any tips. Do we have anyone on Instagram?

Tommy: Final— oh yeah, he's 80%, he's gonna fix it.

Mason: Ryan says, uh, a broken omelette. Nice, you should try.

Josh: Uh, what's the difference between an omelette and a broken omelette?

Mason: Just like scrambled, scrambled eggs.

Josh: It's an omelette that you fucked.

Mason: Yeah, a little bit. Uh, Jess says great fact, 90 serves. And Campbell says if you guys get lost in LA, we know what's happening.

Tommy: What's happening?

Mason: It's in terms of us getting lost and then we feeding— we're feeding on you, Josh.

Tommy: Oh great, yeah, yeah, love it, love it.

Josh: All right guys, Josh Witcher getting fucking taken out. All right, it's a daily talk show. See you tomorrow, guys.

Tommy: See ya.